(Meme)nto mori

Frank helped get this meme going around again. You're supposed to post the sixth photo from the sixth photo folder on your computer. Well, my computer doesn't have six folders of photos, but I grabbed the sixth photo in the last (third) folder. It's a good one!



This was taken at the first Maier family reunion in Manzanita, Oregon, summer of 2007.

Front row left to right: Aunt Loretta, Aunt Helen, Aunt Ruth, Aunt Grace
Back row left to right: Uncle Ed, Uncle Ferd, Uncle Pat, Aunt Jorene, Uncle Morrie

Ferd, Pat, Morrie, Loretta, and Grace are Marty's surviving siblings. Ed is Loretta's husband; Jorene and Ruth are Morrie's and Pat's wives, respectively; and Helen is Uncle Paul's widow.

A family man

We spent last week celebrating the life of Martin J. Maier. And what a life it was!

Marty was born in 1918, the eldest of Frank and Laura Maier’s eight surviving children.
Baby Marty – Spring 1919
Life on the farm in Spalding, Nebraska, was varied, with experiences ranging from being one of the first families with an automobile, to the Dust Bowls times when they drank hot water instead of coffee and the kids walked to school barefoot to spare their shoes.


Marty with his parents and brothers – before the girls and Ferd came along – 1926
(left to right: Morrie, Laura, Marty, Pat, Paul, Franz, Jimmy)

Marty graduated from Spalding Academy in 1935.

Check out that baby face!
In the 30s, the family moved to Yakima, Washington. Marty worked for Western Union, delivering telegrams and picking up cash from the local whorehouses on his Indian motorcycle. (He delighted in telling his grandkids all about that!)
 
In 1941, he was inducted into the U.S. Army. He served three tours in the Pacific, earning a Bronze Star and a Good Conduct Medal. He brought home a lot of memories from the war, good and bad, but he enjoyed telling us about the cute girls he knew in Australia.

Staff Sergeant Maier
At a USO dance in New Orleans, Marty met and fell in love with a local girl, Rosemary Byrnes. At the end of the war, she joined him in Benicia, California, where they married.

Lifemates
After Marty recovered from his latest bout of malaria, they moved to Yakima to be near his family. In 1946, their first child, Marjorie Mary, was born. Rosie tried to learn to be a farmer, but it might have been the day she and Grace were tasked with catching and killing a chicken that convinced her that life wasn’t for her. The little family moved to New Orleans, and in 1948, Frank came along.

Margie, Marty, and Frank on Constance Street
In 1950, Marty graduated Tulane University with a degree in electrical engineering. He accepted a job with Boeing, and the family crossed the country again, to Seattle this time. But in September, tragedy struck. Driving home from a visit to Yakima, their car rolled after being struck by a travel trailer. Margie was killed instantly. Her loss would haunt Marty for the rest of his life.

Injured in the crash, Rosie was in the hospital for a number of months. When she came home, they began to rebuild their lives, and Christine was born in Seattle in late 1951. Marty got a job with New Orleans Public Service Incorporated (NOPSI), and the family moved across country for the last time, finally settling into a house in Metairie that became the family home. Charles (Chuck) was born in 1953 and Judy, in 1955.

Marty’s crew – building the garage on Waltham Street
(Marty, Chuck, Chris, and Frank)
Judy and Marty
After that, life settled into a routine of family time, work, and the occasional family event.

Visiting Laura – circa 1967
The first grandbaby – Judy’s daughter Lori was born in 1974 and promptly wrapped Grandpa around her little fingers. Her little brother, Jerry, arrived in 1975 and followed suit.
And the arrivals continued. Here, Chris’ son, Paul, brushes what’s left of Grandpa’s hair.
By 1982, Marty wasn’t feeling very well, so he retired from NOPSI.

At his retirement party, his coworkers honored his love affair with the Saints…
…and evidently roasted him just a bit.
Being a good sport at DisneyWorld – 1983
Celebrating his 40th anniversary with Rosie and some of the family at a surprise party – 1984
(Marty, Rosie, Judy, Chris, Pat, Paul, Lori, Jerry)
Maier family reunion – 1985
(Jimmy, Pat, Ferd, Coonass Marty, Paul, Morrie)
By 1989, Marty had conquered bladder cancer, had a brain tumor removed, and undergone a valve replacement, so he was feeling much better. Unfortunately, his wife, Rosie, was by then struggling with emphysema, and in 1990, she died. Marty was left very sad and foundered a bit, but he was never alone and was immensely cheered by time with family.

Marty and his last-but-not-least grandbaby, Chloe – 1994
Maier family reunion at our house – 1994
(Morrie, Pat, Paul, Grace, Marty, Loretta)
Marty and his first great-grandchild, Lori’s son, Brian – 1995
Judy and Marty – Christmas 2002
Lori and Bobby’s wedding – November 2004
(Brian, Chiara, Chloe, Frank, MJ, Paul, Chris, Ronnie, Marty, Lori, Bobby, Judy, Gary, Jerry, Cori, Mark, Katie, Karen, Chuck, Eric)
Hippy Marty, granddaughter-in-law Cori, and great-granddaughter Molly – Halloween 2008
In June 2006, Marty suffered a stroke. His mobility and short-term memory were impaired. After a short stint in a nursing home, he moved into Judy’s house, where he lived comfortably, with his days brightened by regular visits from family, until he died on January 19, 2009.

Throughout his life, Marty lived with dignity and honor, providing a foundation for our family that was based on love, laughter, and simply doing the right thing. We will miss him very much.

Marty's obituary

http://obits.nola.com/NOLA/DeathNotices.asp?Page=Lifestory&PersonId=123130495

Chloe and I arrived safely and joined Frank and MJ at Judy's. We had a good night and enjoyed beignets for breakfast. Chuck is at Chrissy's and will be joined tonight be Karen, Eric, and Katie.

Services

Marty's funeral will take place on Friday at Jacob Schoen Funeral Home in New Orleans. The viewing is at 10 with the mass at noon and burial thereafter.

In lieu of flowers, please donate to your favorite charity.

Our heartfelt thanks to all of you for your thoughts, kind words, and support.

Marty

I'm very sad to report that Marty passed away a little bit ago. All of his kids were there for him, and for each other, and it was peaceful.

No word on services yet.

Marty update

Marty had three visitors today: the hospice nurse, the priest, and the nurse practitioner. The hospice nurse says his apnea is occurring more frequently and that he is semi-comatose. The priest performed the Anointing of the Sick (Extreme Unction). And the nurse practitioner, while she wouldn't offer a timeline, made a point of giving them the on-call contacts for this weekend. It seems like it won't be long now.

Frank has caught the cold that is working through the family, so he watched while Chuck and Judy continued sorting, selecting, and scanning photos for the memory board. I intruded a bit and asked for their input into our reservations for the Maier family reunion in July/August. (Note to Maiers reading this: rooms and cabins are filling up quickly, especially if you want to stay for less than a week.)

In one of life's little coincidences, the dad of one of Frank's more likable Jesuit classmates died a couple days ago, so Frank might stop by the services tomorrow if he's feeling better.

Marty update

Marty is about the same, sleeping a lot, coughing a lot, with very brief periods now and then where he both awake and cough-free. I keep hoping to hear that he is improving; Frank says no.

"The kids" went to the funeral home today and made prearrangements. Frank posted about that here. It sounds like they are all pleased with what they've arranged, balancing Catholic ceremonies with city logistics. The services will be in the lovely chapel at the even lovelier funeral home (see Frank's post), and the funeral home is very near the cemetery where Marty will be interred with Rosie.

Other than that, it sounds like they are all finding it really good to be together. Lots of shared memories, lots of laughter, and lots of company for Marty.

Marty update

Judy's house has been a pretty lively place today. Frank had a visit with Bob, Chris came over, Jerry brought Molly by, and Chuck arrived from Houston in the evening. Phew! Much laughter ensued, especially when Molly was talking to her mom, Cori, on the phone and describing her visit with much excitement, at the top of her lungs. Earlier in the day, Marty's breathing had seemed more labored, but he had a cough-free, bright-eyed spell while Molly was there, and smiled and chatted a little.

Another Marty update

Sad news: The visiting nurse was just out at Judy's house again. In addition to the pneumonia, Marty has congestive heart failure. After consulting with the doctor, all have agreed to suspend curative care and focus on keeping Marty comfortable, which primarily involves increasing his dosages of cough medicine and/or morphine as needed.

Marty update

Marty is hanging in there. He didn't have any interest in the football games yesterday (!), so he and Frank watched movies instead.

They are tapering off his prednisone (I'll try to remember to ask why), so his cough is worsening again. He's got some "good stuff" cough medicine, though, and is reasonably comfortable still.

He comes and goes mentally. Frank said two nights ago he was calling out for Eddie. None of us know who Eddie is. (If any of you aunts and uncles know, I'm sure they'd be interested to hear.) But other times he is able to recognize people and converse a bit.

Judy is improving steadily. She has an appetite today, so Frank just had to tell us about how they're eating po'boys. They're also going through old photos and laughing themselves silly. Chris has Wednesday off, so the three of them will get together and talk about arrangements.

Marty update

I'll start with the details I haven't blogged before. Despite being on antibiotics, Marty developed pneumonia. (His lungs are susceptible.) The night before Judy called us, he coughed all night long and neither of them got any sleep. The next day, they increased his dosage of prednisone, so he's coughing less for now. The drug is an immunosuppressant, though, so it won't help in the long run.

But it is making him more comfortable. He (and Judy) got one good night's rest, but then last night wasn't so good again. It was really fortunate that Frank was there to help, because Judy is down with a bad cold.

Frank says Marty isn't really there. He doesn't recognize anyone and doesn't know what's going on. When I spoke to Frank a little bit ago, the caregiver, Crystal, had been there and gotten Marty bathed and settled, and he was sleeping. So was Judy.

Frank and I will keep everyone posted via this blog. Jorene, would you mind passing the word to the family?

Shifts

Changing locations
It's been kind of a tumultuous few days in the Pacific Northwest.

Remember all the rain I was whining about? Well, travel and trucking in the region are mostly at a standstill with many of our major highways, including Interstate 5, closed due to flooding, mudslides, and/or avalanche danger. The trains aren't running either. Fortunately, my mom and Tom were able to get home from the coast today, so they're back where they belong, and Chloe is done dogsitting, so she's back where she belongs.

Unfortunately, MJ is still not where she belongs. She and Harper and friends left his place today for some camping. I hope they get decent, or at least dry, weather down there. She comes home on the 17th.

And Saturday, Frank leaves for New Orleans to see his dad, who is very sick. We're not sure how long he has nor how long Frank will be gone. Frank wrote a lovely post about his dad here. Marty is the world's best father-in-law—he's one of the best men I know—so this is a pretty sad time for us.

What a hoot

Some Hooter girls wishing Marty a happy 90th. There are more girls where he's gazing (in case you had any doubt).

Marty's birthday

Marty turned 90 yesterday. Frank called to wish him a happy one, but he was sleeping, so Frank chatted with Judy instead. In an IM conversation, I asked Frank how Marty is doing. This was his reply:

Fading would be my best word choice. Judy sez he no longer helps at all with transitions. Sleeping a lot. She's looking into getting some kinda lift-thingy which is apparently the way to go when you aren't strong enuf to move the subject all on your own. Got a "cold" he can't completetely shake. But basically, he's mostly the same, just ... less there... But he still enjoys chatting and tv and getting outside. Not too bad, all things considered.

Gustav prep

Most of the New Orleans branch of the Maier clan is evacuating only as far as Judy and Marty's house, which is on high ground north of I-12 (a real demarcation line for Katrina's damage).

Jerry, Cori, and Molly are going a bit farther north and inland to Picayune, Mississippi.

Lori and Brian are going to or with his folks.

We're not sure where Bob and Anita are going, but he spent a good while yesterday making Gort as secure as possible. I'm probably more worried about Gort than the humans, because they are all getting to minimum safe distance while the Oak Harbor marina where Gort is was hit really hard during Katrina.

We'll keep you posted as much as possible as the storm moves ashore.

Marty goes home tomorrow

Marty passed his swallow test and, while he's still coughing some, his white cell count is down, so they know they've addressed the infection. His replaced valve is still semi-functioning, and I suppose there isn't a lot they could do even if it weren't, so they are sending him home tomorrow.

Phew!

Medical updates

Frank's doc suspects meniscus or MCL tear. He's having an MRI this afternoon.

Marty is pretty miserable. He is still coughing a lot and running a fever. Also, he is having trouble swallowing and has no gag reflex, so they aren't letting him eat and have him on IV fluids. He had a mini-swallow test yesterday that didn't reveal much and is having a full swallow test today. And as if all that isn't bad enough, his aortic valve (the pig valve he had put in years and years ago) is stenotic. They can't replace it, because he's too frail. I'll post updates as we learn more.

Homeport

Frank is home!

We picked him up about 2, then went out for Thai food, 'cause he's been craving it for three weeks. Now we're just lounging about the house and helping Chloe get ready for NBTSC.

MJ got packed early so she could spend the day with the Mad-woman (as Frank calls Madelyn) at Hemp Fest. Now they and Mercedes (Mads' mom) are headed to see the Apple War, Madelyn's brother's up-and-coming rock band.

Chuck called with the news that Marty is in the hospital again with another case of pneumonia. Frank was surprised to hear this, because Marty seemed okay yesterday. These lungs things really sneak up on him, I guess. His planned and overdue oral surgery, which was scheduled for tomorrow, is postponed yet again. Too bad, he's got a couple of teeth that are really bothering him.

I'll post updates as we get them.

In the meantime, we're together again and very happy about it. Frank is tanned and trim. He looks like he's the one who spent the last three weeks going to the gym. Sailboats are great for isometric exercise.

But his knee is in pretty bad shape. He hurt it the first time he was at Judy's, but it seemed like a little tweak at the time. It's gradually gotten worse and now, since they got off the boat, it's really sore. He's wearing a knee brace and has an appointment with his doctor on Tuesday.

Tomorrow is our first of two and a half runs to Eugene for camp. I took the day off so I can help with the driving on this run, but the other one and a half will probably be Frank's to do (with MJ's help on the last half run). The first couple of years, going down on the train was fun for the girls, but this year they didn't want to face it. We're taking Madelyn down, too, so we've got a little NBTSC carpool going. Pretty fun.

Chloe and Madelyn come home on the 25th. Harper is joining MJ at the Golds for a couple of days before he heads to Session 2, then Mary is going to bring MJ halfway home on the 29th. Then it's a trip to the Evergreen State Fair, and then it's time for our big trip.

And that's how summer is going, going, gone around here...

The Doings Report

We've had a pretty quiet week and weekend. On Tuesday, we had a quiet celebration at home, just the four of us, for Chloe's actual birthday. I got off early from work, Frank made Cornish game hens, and Chloe opened her gifts from us. It was a collection of little things—some clothes, some books (including the aforementioned massage book which has paid off so nicely for moi), and a snazzy little purse—but she seemed well pleased with them, and she's well stocked for Europe now.

On Wednesday, I had a deadline, so I had to miss out on our monthly STUN game day. Frank filled in for me, and it sounds like they had a pretty good time. They ate leftover birthday cake (a towering chocolate concoction), and they played Makin' Groceries (a humorous New Orleans version of Go Fish) and Guillotine.

With the help of some birthday money, Chloe and MJ have been continuing their Buffy marathon. This means their schedule has been erratic and we haven't seen much of them, aside from their sudden, laughing appearances between episodes. But it is an incredible bonding experience for the two of them, giving them a whole new language, it seems, for speaking to each other. Joss Whedon has scored another hit with my daughters.

At some point during the week, I got caught up with Cherie. She and Steve and Pat are home from Puerto Vallarta, and Cherie and Steve have taken possession of their new RV. They'll leave soon for a "shakedown cruise" to Texas.

And Frank spoke to Judy. She and Marty are settled into the new place and getting accustomed to their new routine. Now Jerry and Cori are taking a turn househunting. They are looking for a place in Metairie, closer to their jobs, due to some unsurprising but still frustrating developments with MawMaw Jerce (as Frank calls her) and the house in Chalmette. It sounds like Jerry has adopted a healthy attitude, figuring the money he's put into the house is not much more than they would have paid in rent for these months. But they are still losing out on all that sweat equity, not to mention the discomfort they put up with living in a hurricane-ravaged home, and it can't be easy for him to face yet another betrayal from that quarter.

Sunday, we and the girls went in separate directions. The girls attended an all-day private Dungeons and Dragons tournament. I haven't heard the full report yet, but the early word is that they had mega fun and Chloe thwarted the Dungeon Master at one point by figuring out a riddle he'd been sure would stump them for a while.

Meanwhile, Frank and I went out to the beach for Erin's birthday. It was a small group with four of the girls missing (Chelsea and Megan are sick), but the ones who were there had a fine time indeed. And my mom made her incredible fried chicken. Yum!

Tom's appointment with the surgeon is tomorrow. Please send outpatient good vibes his and our way!

Coming up this week: more work for me but a nice, sane amount; some minor plumbing repairs for Frank to the Super Toilet which is leaking (thankfully) from the clean-water side; and I assume some more Buffy for the girls. On Saturday, we're hopefully having our Seahawks buddies (and my coworkers) Lori and Brian over for some dinner and a creative session of Easter egg dyeing. I predict some eggs in blue and green. :-)

The Doings Report

Well, we had a lovely weekend with the Golds. We talked and hung out and laughed and ate and relaxed. On Saturday, we drove down to Seattle for the Kimya Dawson concert at the Fusion Café.

For those who don't know, Kimya is featured on the Juno soundtrack. Her songs are quirky and sweet, often political, and unapologetically organic. And also for those who don't know (we didn't before now), the Fusion Café is actually a room in the downtown YMCA where they hold all-ages events from time to time. "All ages" turned out to mean "teenagers," so those of us over 40 were ever so slightly out of place until the show started, and then we were all just fans, sitting on the floor together, blowing bubbles and enjoying varying amounts of (dis)comfort.

Not knowing what to expect and fearful of the Golds driving all the way up here only to be turned away at the door, we got downtown a couple hours early. We found a parking space right in front of the building (!) and were wandering around a bit, trying to figure out the setup, when who should pull up in front but Kimya herself. Mary got a hug and the rest of us just grinned at her.

Highlight: At one point, Kimya announced that she would play a few kid songs. My heart sank a little—"Oh, do we have to?"—but they were SO good, cute and funny and offbeat. I highly recommend her upcoming kids' album, due out this summer. "F is for fart, G is for gorilla fart, H is for huge gorilla fart..."

This show was hosted by Hollow Earth Radio, an underground radio station in Seattle. I've never had any exposure to the underground radio scene, so that was pretty fascinating. A couple of people asked how to listen. The founders got cagey smiles on their faces, then referred us to http://www.hollowearthradio.com/. I suspect there's more to the story. :-)

After the show, we decided to run to Fremont and see if Jai Thai happened to still be open. They were! What a treat! Frank and Chloe and I discovered this place a few months ago and have been itching to go back. Yummy stuff, although we were worried at first that we wouldn't have enough food to fill our suddenly bottomless stomachs. We topped off with a last-minute order of fried rice, and then returned home.

Yesterday, we said our good-byes to Mary and Conor, but Qacei has stayed behind to play and help Chloe celebrate her upcoming 14th birthday.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to get STUN going again. We took a bit of a hiatus while all our February goings-on were going on, but it's time to get rockin' again. Or rollin'. We're starting with some bowling. Always fun to laugh at ourselves at the bowling alley.

In other news, my stepdad, Tom, is facing some excitement: an aortic aneurism. It seems scary stuff to him and to those of who love him, but the doctors are relaxed; his appointment with the surgeon just got moved back from the 7th to the 17th.

And Frank's sister Judy was supposed to and hopefully did close on her new house last week. I'll check and make sure. If people need Marty's new address, drop me a line and let me know.