Book review: The Five Second Rule

The Five Second Rule is by Mel Robbins, a no-nonsense self-help guru I think I'd enjoy having a beer with. She mentioned the five second rule almost in passing in her TedX talk and was flooded with comments from people it helped. So, she published this book.

The TedX bit is very short. The book should have been shorter. It's full of (cringe-inducingly unedited) testimonials, and Mel made the unfortunate decision to introduce the testimonials by telling you what they say. Then you read it yourself. So, especially the early chapters *really* drag without giving you any great quantity of practical info.

The later chapters are better, and the book as a whole is, well, a miracle cure for procrastination.

When I started reading the book, I was procrastinating many things, but the most public and pressing thing was my one-hour talk for LIFE is Good Unschooling Conference. I had nothing done, just a collection of links and some half-assed scribbled notes. I sat down with the book one day, got about ten pages in, and then got up and started writing my talk. I made significant and high quality progress on that talk and its accompanying slides for three days in a row, and then it was DONE. What's more, it was done two days before my personal deadline and five days before the actual presentation. If you know me, you know how unprecedented this is.

And I hadn't finished the book! The Five Second Rule is life-changing. Skim or ignore the boring, repetitive bits, pick out the good parts version, and watch things start to happen.

Also, definitely do the free 31-day coaching Mel links to in the author blurb area. Good stuff!

Spoiler: One of the lessons in the mentoring asks you to do something you've been procrastinating. That lesson hit my inbox maybe ten days after I read the book. Friends, there wasn't anything. I couldn't think of anything I was procrastinating because I'D DONE OR STARTED EVERYTHING. Seriously. Miracle cure.

Unschooling snapshot

On Friday, Mary Gold and I spent over an hour in Barnes & Noble watching our 17-year-old unschooled daughters, Qacei and Chloe, as they lusted over a particular display of books. The sign on the display? Required School Reading.

Reading images

Check out the terrific collection of art and photos related to reading that my friend Steph has put together. Too fun!

http://sayitagainsammie.blogspot.com/2010/01/r-is-for-reading.html

A literary feast

MJ brought home a treasure from the library: Erica Bauermeister's utterly delicious debut novel, The School of Essential Ingredients. The flavors and scents and feelings and dreams contained in this book are beyond description, and yet Ms. Bauermeister describes every one, in poignant and lyrical fashion. I give it my strongest recommendation, accompanied by the suggestion that you not read too much about the story before you read the story itself.

Here is just one very small sample of the numerous passages—pick a page, any page!—that moved me:

Over the hours, the labor pains had sharpened... She kept thinking the waves would slow or break for a moment, but they didn't, one after another until there was nowhere left to go but in, to dive down and hope for air on the other side, but there was no air, no way out, just a desperate reaching and grasping until finally she felt something deep inside her—not physical, not emotional, simply her—break into pieces. And into the arms of that cracked-apart person that had been Claire, they placed a baby and a love came out of her, through the pieces, that she didn't even know was possible.

Warning: After reading this book, you will almost certainly be headed for the market in search of your own essential ingredients. Buon appetito!

Chit chat

After a long Twitter-free spell, I have been tweeting again the past couple of days. My desire to communicate minutiae seems to come in waves, and for whatever reason (etiquette?), I do not wish to use Facebook for these tweetish communications. (My status updates on FB tend to be about chunks of time—e.g., "Ronnie Maier has her kids back!!"—rather than random moments here and there—e.g., "I am trimming my toenails.")

But what do I do when my desire to blab details exceeds my tweet tolerance level? I write a megatweet blog post, obviously. It probably makes for pretty boring stuff, but I suppose Blogging Without Obligation means I'm not obliged to be especially interesting.

I read "The Five Languages of Love" tonight. I first heard about this book from Beth Fuller and have been enjoying a broader appreciation of all Frank does for me since then. It's been lovely to take every clean dish as an "I love you." You know? But now Frank and I have both figured out our official Love Language profiles, and it turns out that "Acts of Service" isn't his love language any more than it is mine. Oh, well, I still appreciate those clean dishes.

Interestingly, Frank and I scored almost identically for our profiles, with "Physical Touch" and "Quality Time" tied for the top position. Gary Chapman, the author, says partners don't necessarily enjoy such fluency in each other's love language, so this might be a contributing factor to why Frank and I get on so well. It also seems possible that one of us started out with one of those as primary and the other with the other, but that after more than two decades of adjusting to each other's needs, our priorities have been adapted.

The other two languages are "Affirmations" and "Receiving Gifts."

Chloe and I went to the library this evening and each brought home huge armloads of books. Hers are mostly about getting into college, something that is very much on both girls' minds right now. Mine are mostly about geology, just because.

I missed House and Castle last night. (Monday is "guys named after buildings" night on TV.)

Our house still smells like bacon, 14 hours after breakfast.

After a surprisingly pleasant couple of days, the damp is rolling in again. MJ has been hogging the "We're season ticketholders and don't you forget it even if we might want to after that game against the Cardinals" Seahawks throw blanket, so I'm sitting here wrapped in the dragonfly-dotted fleece blanket I won in the LIFE is Good silent auction last May. Cozy! All in all, though, I'd rather be in Arizona with Uncle Scott. (But I still wouldn't root for the Cards.)

If I'm still not working in November, I'm thinking about doing NaNoWriMo. But I might settle for NaBloPoMo. Both girls are also contemplating NNWM, so we may find ourselves entering into some serious computer negotiations. Anybody got a laptop we can borrow for a month? If not, I'll have to encourage Chloe to resume her nightowl thing. ;-)

Not being that much of a nightowl myself, I'm done now. Good night!

Unschooling meme

I imagine my answers will be somewhat similar to Frank's, but that's okay, since his answers are what inspired me to do this one anyway.

Unschooling versions provided by Linda Wyatt.

1. Original question: What time do you get up?
Unschooling version: What sleep schedules do people in your house have? Do you all have fairly similar schedules, or not? Are you the kind of people who wish things were open 24/7?

I am usually the first one awake. When I'm working, I get up about 8. When I'm not working, I wake up about that same time but might not actually get out of bed for a good while after that. Frank and MJ aren't far behind me. Chloe usually surfaces about noon or one but might be awake in her room for a while before that; she loves hanging out in her room.

I like the convenience of open-all-night businesses, but our hours tend to be more conventional than that. Except I tend to do our banking at about 10 p.m. Not sure why.

2. Original question: What do your children wear to school?
Unschooling version: Do you know any good sources for great stuff to wear? Some examples: vests with lots of pockets, good boots, lightweight jackets with a sleeve pocket for pens, comfortable cotton tees with interesting designs. Anything you have that you love that other people might not know about?

We shop at the thrift store when there's something in particular we're looking for. "Something in particular" ranges from jeans to cosplay supplies to just something new. Lately, MJ loves Wet Seal. I like finding things on the clearance rack at Target: cheap, comfortable, nothing I'm going to be too sad to find stained or worn out.

Significant portions of our wardrobes bear unschooling conference logos.

3. Original question: What curriculum have you tried and hated? What have you tried and loved?
Unschooling version: Any good references to suggest? Websites, catalogs, whatever? Any that you have found that tend to be suggested by folks, that you really didn't find useful? Favorite books?

I love Wikipedia. Everything is in there, and while it is generally pretty well researched, it inspires critical reading. The "Needs citation" notes are brilliant for that.

IMDB.com is really fun. (Did you know Kevin Pollack is one of the brownies in Willow? I've seen that movie dozens of times and didn't notice til Frank and the girls pointed it out the other night. Still disbelieving, I went straight to IMDB to confirm. Conversation and research all took place while the movie was rolling.)

Speaking of that, having a laptop is a FABULOUS resource. Portable information, entertainment, communication, networking, computing.

We go to the library about once a week, Half Price Books about once a month, other book stores and Amazon.com as needed.

Any video entertainment your kids want to watch is another fabulous resource. And I do mean Any. Video. Entertainment. I can't begin to list all the learning that has been inspired and/or reinforced by TV shows, movies, and video games. It's astonishing to me that the educational establishment is so completely missing the boat on this.

4. Original question: Who is your most inspirational homeschooling role model?
Unschooling version: How did you decide to unschool? Do you have any good sources of info to share? Anyone in particular who helped you make this choice?

The collected minds on unschooling.com were my primary inspiration. Actually, my first reaction was, "These people are really out there!" But as I read a lot (LOT) of information about homeschooling, those unschooling voices kept calling me. The seeds were planted, and I began to see in our lives—even while our kids were in school—what the people "out there" were talking about. By the time we officially pulled our kids out of school, I was 80% an unschooler. One math lesson after that, it was closer to 90%.

5. Original question: Abeka, Charlotte Mason, unschooling, or Classical?
Unschooling version: What kinds of ways do your family members learn about stuff these days?

Books and videos and the Internet. Personal interaction with other people.

But the biggie? Conversation. Conversation is what ties it all together.

6. Original question: Favorite response to “What about socialization?”
Unschooling version: How do you talk to people who ask clueless questions about unschooling? Any favorite stories? Suggestions for dealing with family members who are fearful or critical?

The main thing we get is that unschooling works for us because our kids are so bright. Countering that is tough, because, well, of course I think my kids are the most amazing people on the planet!

And it is true that our unschooling is tailored to their strengths. Our unschooling tends to be somewhat cerebral. We do a lot of things that are pleasing to the academically inclined: lots of words, lots of writing, lots of reading. And my kids actually enjoy their state-mandated standardized testing. They test well, producing lovely, academically reassuring annual test scores.

But I try to explain that unschooling works because all kids, regardless of their so-called intelligence quotients, thrive when they get to pursue what matters to them. I know a lot of unschoolers, and they are all bright and amazing. Most of the time, I have no idea—literally NONE—where those kids would rank in a classroom setting or how they would score on a standardized test. Who cares?

WHO CARES?

What matters is that they are bright, happy, interesting, accomplished, engaged and engaging. Unschooling doesn't only work for kids of "above-average intelligence," or kids whose parents are teachers, or kids who can recite the alphabet while twirling a baton, or any other limiting factor.

Unschooling works because the unschooled individual has the time and support to follow the interesting byways that lead to real learning.

7. Original question: Favorite subject?
Unschooling version: What are you guys up to these days? What are you doing that is so terrific that you think others should hear about it?

Hmm. Lots of music around here since about January. Actually, for MJ, music is a driving force and has been for years. But we're all playing with musical instruments lately. I can play "Sympathy for the Devil" on the guitar! And my love for African drumming continues.

I learned to hula hoop at LIFE is Good. I've never been able to do it before. My (adult) friend Dana said three words and *poof*, I could hula hoop. (The three words were "make smaller motions.")

I've been exploring the effects of shame on kids and am formulating a new unschooling presentation.

I have put out some feelers and am probably returning to work in July.

We're doing lots (LOTS) of socializing. Movies tomorrow. Gathering of unschoolers on Thursday. Maia is staying over Thursday night. And there's something this weekend, but I'm drawing a blank. Where'd I put my calendar?

Qacei and Chloe want to get together. Mental note: Find calendar. Find blank space on calendar.

8. Original question: Favorite field trip ever?
Unschooling version: Been anywhere cool? Where? Have any stories to share about adventures you've had? I'd be especially interested in hearing about adventures to places that few people know about. Pictures, too.

Frank got into some of our travels, so I'm going to think smaller (but no less precious).

When the Waynforths were here in May, we toured the Boeing facility here in Everett. Despite living no more than 15 minutes from this facility for most of my life, I had never been before. We got to see the first ever 787. We got to sit in the cockpit of a jet and flip all the switches we wanted to. Simon and Linnaea flew a simulator, and MJ blew up a bit of (simulated) desert with a (simulated) missile.

The next day, we stuck chewing gum on a very colorful wall in Post Alley near the Pike Place Market. And we visited the Seattle Aquarium, where MJ and Chloe looked at every creature in the place and played and laughed just like their younger counterparts.

Later, we ate Thai food, and then we visited the Fremont Troll and his pet VW bug, a gigantic but whimsical art installation under Highway 99. The kids took turns sitting on the troll's head.

For some quiet time, we watched "Firefly" and played a card game the name of which is escaping me right now. Munchkins? Is that it?

This is IT, folks. Exploring. Playing together. Talking about it all. Pretending to pull boogers out of a troll's nose. The good stuff!

9. Original question: Best thing about homeschooling?
Unschooling version: we can pretty much leave this one as-is. What have you found to be the most rewarding about how your family lives?

Being together. Knowing my kids. Opening up my own world by being open to theirs. Experiences.

Before LIFE is Good, I painted one window on our van with these words:

LIVE LOVE LAUGH LEARN

(See photo here)

That's the best thing about unschooling, having all of those L-words bundled up into one lovely lifestyle.

10. Original question: Sports, music, or art?
Unschooling version: I still don't know where to go with this question. Care to share any interesting things you've done or are doing in any of these fields? Anything you've had time to delve into that you might not have if you were busy doing schoolwork?

MJ played volleyball for a while, sometimes with Frank. Chloe hates competitive sports. Frank and I are moderately avid football and baseball fans, and we've had some lovely family outings to Safeco Field, a cathedral to baseball. Chloe and I walk together occasionally. Frank has his sword arts.

Frank goes into some detail about our music. I'll just mention that I've learned guitar chords from all three of them, which I absolutely love. Building my guitar skills is a family project! :-)

Both girls draw, especially Chloe with her manga. She recently drew a whole set of Norse gods and goddesses in manga style, very detailed and clever drawings that reveal the depth of her knowledge of Norse mythology. MJ is a beautiful photographer (and she takes pretty pictures, too! ba-doom). I crochet scarves every now and then. We all take occasional advantage of our shelf of art supplies.

I don't know if school would have kept us from any of that, but there would have been a lot less of all of it.

11. Original question: Beautiful script handwriting, or lightning fast accurate typing?
Unschooling version: Don't know where to go with this question, either, since I don't really understand why it was even asked. Make something up.

MJ has the prettiest handwriting of all of us. She can write in italics. It's nifty!

Chloe and Frank write like typical Maiers. But both can do pretty when it matters. Chloe's captions on her art, for instance, are very flowing and artsy.

I touch type, except I look at the keyboard whenever I want to. Frank hunts and misses. The girls have developed their own keyboarding methods and are really fast.

12. Original question: Best one stop shopping for school books?
Unschooling version: Best place to get books? Or other things, too, like some of those fabulous websites that have all sorts of really cool toys and equipment. Where do you find cool stuff?

Our favorite stores to visit lately are those that sell musical instruments. And I love Fair Trade stores.

13. Original question: One subject you didn’t get to this week:
Unschooling version: What do you wish you had time for this week that you didn't fit in?

The important stuff always gets squeezed in. Time is usually not the problem: I often wish I had more willpower. Chloe (who loves burrowing into her room with books and her sketchpad and piles of dirty dishes) periodically laments the lack of long stretches of time without fun social stuff to do.

14. Original question: What will you do when you run out of kids to teach?
Unschooling version: What ways have you found to continue your own learning? What kinds of things have you gotten interested in since having kids? Do you have any particular plans once fewer people live in your house, whenever that may be?

I'm more open to my own learning than I was before unschooling. I've learned (ha!) to recognize all the learning I do.

New interests since unschooling: African drumming, guitar, blogging, public speaking, sexy backup singing, growing things until I get bored and everything dies, reading historical romance novels (I now know so much more about world history than I learned in school!), birdwatching, Tai Chi... Probably more.

Frank and I want to travel more. Maybe the girls will take over the nest and we'll go be fledglings.

15. Original question: Ever give school books as holiday or Birthday gifts?
Unschooling version: What's the best book gift you have ever given? Gotten?

We give books all the time. Chloe loves getting a box full of manga. I love getting gift certificates to book stores. Possibilities!

16. Original question: Better late or early (delay formal education at home, or start as young as possible?)
Unschooling version: (1) Are there some things you find you prefer a class structure for? (2) What alternatives have you found for learning things most people think can only happen in a class? (3) Do different members of your family have different learning styles, and if so, can you tell me a little about that and how it has affected how you do things?

First, the original question: Start early to strew wonderful things in your children's lives. Delay formal instruction until the kid asks for it (if he ever does).

(1) No.

(2) Fiction. Stories are amazing teachers. Videos, books, comic books, video games, funny pages, and whatever comes out of the imagination. They all lead to more, more, more.

Also, learning by snippets. Most people think you have to sit down for 50 minutes every day for three months and study subject X. Actually, humans are quite capable of connecting and sorting out snippets learned years apart in vastly different venues.

(3) I wrote about this here.

What unschooling looked like last night

MJ spent yesterday afternoon shopping with Grandma and GG. After, they went to Madison's school's holiday concert with Maddie's family. And then MJ went to spend the night with cousin Chelsea, taking advantage of the school district's already announced delayed start due to ice all over the freaking place.

Chloe, meanwhile, was engaged in her own pursuits. I had come home early to avoid an icy commute, so she kept me company while I did some mostly mindless work, eating (and annihilating) a couple of Cutie oranges while chatting about Chloe things. When I needed to concentrate, she got cozy on the couch with a couple of books. She spent some time with "Historic Haunted America" and then switched to "Anguished English: An Anthology of Accidental Assaults Upon Our Language." Every so often she would share one of the more amusing assaults, such as the headline "Juvenile Court Tries Shooting Suspects." I think my favorite was the sign from a Paris hotel elevator: "Please leave your values at the front desk."

We talked about the forecasted low of 11 degrees (I don't think it really went that low) and the measures Frank and I were taking to avoid frozen pipes.

Grandma came to visit for a while and we drank tea and tried to sell her on Firefly. We talked about poetry, and Chloe revealed that, while she had read my copy of "Rose" by Li-Young Lee, with its poetic narration of his sad experiences as a Chinese immigrant, she prefers poetry that rhymes. Grandma and I reminisced a bit about "Tapestry," the volume of poetry produced by the English department at my high school, and Chloe remembered reading some of my poems long ago.

I fished out Chloe's 12 Days of Christmas gift for the day, the latest issue of Shojo Beat (a manga magazine). She was thrilled! And then she was gone, happily reading away with only the occasional excited outburst. "Movies, Mom! Of some of the manga I read!"

Later, she dove back into "Anguished English" while I blogged about my lack of Christmas spirit. I think she finished it. We came together again over the horoscopes in Shojo Beat, which were better written than many I've seen, and I admired their clever use of their pimped-for-each-sun-sign mascot. I continued leafing through the magazine, much to her delight. We talked idly about the Year of the Ox and some Japanese home remedies for the common cold, and then we stumbled across a little blurb about a Shinto shrine right here in Washington. This inspired an excited trip to the Internet to read all about the Tsubaki Grand Shrine of America, Shinto traditions, and so on. You could practically hear the pinging as she made connections to things learned previously from reading manga and watching anime.

After that, it was getting late, so I headed up to bed and she returned to "Haunted America." I just opened it at a random page to find out what sort of thing she might have read about. The story I landed on was about William Harrison and Tecumseh and touched on "Tippecanoe and Tyler Too." Imagine that.

NaBloPoMo "V"

V is for Very Odd



Tonight was our immediate-family celebration of Frank's birthday (which actually takes place tomorrow). MJ and Chloe accompanied us for a Thai feast (way more dishes than we could eat, followed by coconut ice cream) and helped me to present a couple of gifts to the birthday boy, but then they got a better offer: a sleepover at Grandma's.

"That's okay," said Frank. "Your mom and I can have hot dinosaur sex in every room in the house."

The girls then proceeded to tell us in great detail what rooms, and what surfaces in those rooms, we are allowed to use. It was rather surreal.

But I figure what they don't know won't hurt them.

---

On another "odd" subject, have you read Dean Kootz' books about Odd Thomas? We recommend them highly.

Thursday 13

Thirteen of My Favorite Non-romance* Novels *but possibly still romantic After writing my romance-novel TT last week, it occurred to me that there really are only two literary genres for me: romance and non-romance. So, here's my non-romance list. To make this list, a book had to move me considerably, one way or another. 1. Bridge of Birds by Barry Hughart. With equal parts mystery, adventure, comedy, romance, and philosophy, this lovely little book is pure fun and a treasured friend. 2. The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood by Rebecca Wells. This is a powerful story about how women shape each other's lives, but if I had to sum up its subject matter in one word, it would be "motherhood." Life altering. 3. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J. K. Rowling. This is my favorite of the 7-book series, but it's here to represent a literary achievement that has enhanced our family experience since the girls were toddlers. 4. Where the Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls. My 5th-grade teacher read this to our class. Dan and Ann have been with me ever since. 5. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. Time-travel adventure, enduring romance, political intrigue, roaring battles, bawdy humor, and sex scenes to make even a jaded romance novelist blush. Yes, this book has it all. The sequels are pretty good, too, but this one is the best. 6. A tie from the Cautionary Tale department: The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood and Trinity's Child by William Prochnau. I probably won't ever read either of these again, but both were so compelling that, after reading them, I never looked at the world quite the same way. 7. The Ladies of Missalonghi by Colleen McCullough. Missy is a lovely heroine. "Will you marry me, Mr. Smith?" Sweet and shiny. 8. And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie. The ultimate murder mystery. 9. Eaters of the Dead by Michael Crichton. This thinly disguised Beowulf knock-off is an exciting adventure story tucked into a very clever "scholarly" format. The footnotes about Norse culture and the real Ibn Fadlan are endlessly fascinating. 10. The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Wow! 11. The Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris. Disturbing, scary, fascinating. I like Hannibal, too—it's much better than the movie—and Red Dragon creeped me out big time, but this one was his tour de force. 12. Interview with the Vampire, The Vampire Lestat, and The Queen of the Damned by Anne Rice. I didn't find the world of "Interview" very comfortable; it took me a couple of months to get all the way through that book. But by the end of it, I was completely hooked. I might have gotten up off the couch once or twice while reading the other two. Maybe. 13. The Princess Bride by S. Morgenstern and William Goldman. There have been ten great adventure stories in our time, but of all of them, this is the greatest. William Goldman guides us through "the good parts version" that inspired his screenwriting for decades. The ones I left off: "Holes," "The Outsiders," "To Kill a Mockingbird," "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close," "East," and probably a host of others that didn't leap to mind. Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Thursday 13

Thirteen of My Favorite Romance Novels Whether or not these are the top 13 depends on my mood, but they are definitely among those that I like to read again and again. 1. Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas. Villain as hero, beautifully and believably transformed by the disdain—or is it love?—of a good woman. Third book in a consistently good 4-book series. Historical. 2. Secrets of a Summer Night by Lisa Kleypas, also of the above series. This one scores big for melodrama done just right. Historical. 3. It's in His Kiss by Julia Quinn. The brightest, funniest installment in her very fun Bridgerton series. Meet poor Mr. Mozart... Historical. 4. Born in Fire, Born in Ice, and Born in Shame by Nora Roberts. Three books that together tell one wonderful family story. Set in the Ireland I'm hoping to visit. Contemporary. 5. The MacKade Brothers, a four-book series by Nora Roberts. Sexiest heroes ever. Contemporary. 6. Finding the Dream by Nora Roberts. I always start with the first two books in this 3-book series, but it's really all about getting to this one. Michael Fury is a great hero. Contemporary. 7. The Bride by Julie Garwood. Plucky, displaced heroine keeps her new clan on their toes, starts a few wars, and then, of course, saves the day. Historical. 8. The Secret by Julie Garwood. Reluctant midwife finds her place with her best friend's new clan—and its laird. Historical. 9. Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie. Sharp, funny writing highlights a quirky romance where our protagonists really are each other's heroes. Contemporary. 10. Welcome to Temptation by Jennifer Crusie. Engaging cast of characters in a sexy whodunit. No, really, whodunit? Contemporary. 11. A Prince of a Guy and The Princess and the Pea by Kathleen Korbel. Really fun fairy tales. Contemporary. 12. Accompanying Alice by Terese Ramin. Alice is already facing middle age, an empty nest, and a family wedding (the horror) when she finds herself first the hostage and then the not-terribly-reluctant hostess of a desperate special agent. Contemporary. 13. Nobody's Darling by Teresa Medeiros. I'm not usually crazy about Westerns, but this one stole my heart. Billy Darling—the honorable black sheep of his outlaw family—is a hero I can root for. Historical. Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Indexed

I've been tagged by Zenmomma for the alphabet meme. Frank and MJ have done theirs, too.

For those who don't know, I was an indexer in a former (reoccurring) life. For those who don't know, an indexer is a person who has as her job/calling/passion the creation of the lists of page-referenced keywords you find in the back of your nonfiction books. This is a surprisingly compelling occupation for those of us who take to it, and after more than a decade as an indexer, it took quite some time to become accustomed to writing in full sentences again. Writing style, restoration of.

Anyway, as you might imagine, having things alphabetized is just *right*. My books, movies, CDs, records, and often my shopping lists run from A to Z.

Imagine my surprise, then, when MJ organized our homeschooling shelves in a complete jumble of topics, authors, and genres and I LOVED it. It's a wonderful hodgepodge, a sign of unschooling at its finest. I will post a picture of that space someday.

But I digress. It's a Maier thing.

Here, appropriately, is "The Index of Ronnie," aka "Ronnie from A to Z." Enjoy!

A-Available? Of course! (Oh, for that? Only to Frank.)
B-Best friend: Stephanie
C-Cake or Pie? Pie! Especially cream pie!
D-Drink of choice: Strawberry Margarita but only on special occasions (aka, any visit to the Mexican restaurant)
E-Essential thing used everyday: I like Mary's answer ("My brain (hopefully)"), but I'll strive for originality here. My GORE-TEX rain jacket, which really ought to have been included in my list of items I'm glad — GLAD, I tell you — that I own.
F-Favorite color: I like 'em all, tend to prefer dark and bright shades (not pastels, in other words), and will tell you "purple" if pressed to pick just one.
G-Gummi bears or worms: Bears, I guess. But I'm with Qacei on this: Swedish Fish!
H-Hometown: I was born in Ellensburg, remember fondly the house in San Francisco, (mostly) grew up in Marysville, spent very memorable teen summers in San Diego, and am now very much at home in Everett.
I-Indulgence: Yes, please. Not this kind. And not this kind. And not this kind (but more power to ya, Sisters!). But maybe this kind.
J-January or February: They both make me shiver. January for its distance from tax day. February for its proximity to Spring.
K-Kids and names: MJ, Chloe, Chiara, and nephew-son Jerry.
L-Life: Lovin' every minute of it!
M-Marriage date: The ceremony and small kickass party were on August 24, 1990. The big kickass party was on August 25, 1990. Did you really think a single day of celebration was enough for us?!
N-Number of siblings: 1 sister, 1 half-brother, 1 step-brother, 1 sort-of sister, 4 sisters-in-law, and 2 brothers-in-law. And I really hope I didn't forget anybody.
O-Oranges or apples: Mandarin oranges or caramel apples, and either will do nicely, thank you.
P-Phobias: I have this mild claustrophobia that is related to my shark blood (if I stop moving, I'll die). If the way out is blocked, I get a little panicky. And I am afraid of unexpected explosions. I have no idea what the Greek for that is.
Q-Quote: "I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul." — William Ernest Henley, Invictus
R-Reason to smile: Oh, too many to choose from! My family. Friends. Only 304 days left. Unschooling. Our plans for this year. The small kids in my life. The teenagers in my life. MY LIFE!
S-Season: Summer.
T-Tag three people: I'll pick on honor some family members this time: Mom, Scott, Randi.
U-Unknown fact about me: I don't think there are any, or if there is one, I'm entitled to it, don't you think?
V-Vegetable you don't like: Canned peas and canned spinach.
W-Worst habit: Oh, too many to choose from! Saying "no" to my kids. Biting my nails. Staying up too late reading when I have to get up early the next day. Speeding. Coming home from work with low blood sugar. Procrastinating. Being superstitious.
X-X-rays you have had: Teeth only, I think. (knock wood)
Y-Your favorite food: Oh, too many to choose from! Chocolate. Cilantro. Frank's fried bananas. Bread.
Z-Zodiac: Gemini Air Yin Wood Snake. No wonder there are so many people inside me!

What unschooling looked like this weekend

This weekend, I can't speak with much authority about how my kids spent their time or what they learned. I decided to do my monthly "day in the life" post anyway, because the increasing independence of a couple of teen unschoolers is part of what it's all about.

MJ is away from home, visiting Zenmomma and family and Harper in Corvallis, Oregon. She made her own travel plans, purchased her tickets online, did her own laundry, got her luggage packed, and kept her parents and Zenmomma informed so she'd have rides to and from the Greyhound stations. She's spent the weekend hanging out with an unknown number of other teens. She did this. She's probably also gotten to eat at Sunnyside Up at least once, something that causes her mother a measure of envy. Beyond that, I know not.

Chloe has spent the weekend in a series of self-directed activities. She does this often, having long periods where she is busy doing her own thing and we see her only intermittently. The specific activities I know are:

* She got out all the Harry Potter books and made a list of the more significant character deaths, then discussed this list with us in some detail.
* She created a Harry Potter guild on Neopets and then put together a detailed and interesting guild Web site on Freewebs. (I'll share the URL if I remember to get permission.)
* She made homemade thank-you notes for her Christmas gifts from out-of-town relatives. (I don't know if she finished this task, and now she's away, too, so if you are one of these generous people and never receive a thank-you note, you'll at least know that her heart was in the right place.)
* She spent a long session playing with the rats.
* She tolerated her parents' football frenzy (and then comforted us afterward).
* She and I read "Son of the Morning" by Linda Howard aloud together, skimming from good part to good part, and discussed what it might be like to find ourselves cut off from our routines, support base, money, lifestyle, etc. This book is part historical mystery, so we also discussed the Knights Templar, Friday the 13th, and what languages an educated person might have known in the 14th century.
* She got herself ready and packed so she could start the three-week dogsitting job that she and MJ have taken on. (She agreed to take the first shift so MJ could go to Oregon.)

Beyond those, I know not.

When Chiara came to live with us, she created a new e-mail account, which she still has (but rarely checks) to this day. It includes the phrase "il grande volo di Chiara," or "the grand flight of Chiara." I always loved that, and if you know Chiara, you know how perfect it is for her. But that is what unschooling is all about: watching our kids take flight. And that is what unschooling looked like this weekend.

Thursday 13

Thirteen Books and Movies that Show How Cool Unschooling Is Books 1. Surviving the Applewhites by Stephanie S. Tolan 2. Stargirl and Love, Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli 3. Skellig by David Almond 4. Birds, Beasts and Relatives by Gerald Durrell 5. Never Cry Wolf by Farley Mowat (also a great movie) 6. Diary of a Fairy Godmother by Esmé Raji Codell Note: If you think you're too old for any of these, think again! Each is a great work of literature, suitable for all ages. Movies 7. Accepted 8. Breakfast Club 9. Ferris Bueller's Day Off 10. School of Rock 11. Groundhog Day 12. Adventures in Babysitting 13. Mumford 13. American Dreamer (Okay, okay, so that's fourteen, but I couldn't decide which one to leave off.) Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Harry Potter 7 part 2

Okay, we've finished it. This post contains spoilers, so I've hidden it. To read, click and drag your mouse to select the blank space below; my words will be revealed as if by magic! For those who don't want to be spoiled, I'll just say that it was a fabulous book, perhaps the best of the seven. But it's not for the faint of heart.

Here's an amazing fact: Chloe chose to be the Gray Lady at the release party for this book, and the Gray Lady (otherwise barely a footnote in the books) plays an important role in this book. How cool is that? Chloe is psychic!

J.K. Rowling is an amazing writer. She did everything that was required to make this book satisfying and complete. All the questions are answered, all the stray details she included in earlier books are wrapped up into a neat package, and there were numerous times when we were moved to tears.

Of course, some of those tears were over the heart-wrenching deaths of a few beloved characters. I wish she'd been a little kinder to our old friends!

But others were over amazingly written sequences, moments of such profound significance to those of us who have lived and breathed Harry Potter for a decade that we couldn't do anything but cry. In this book, we got to revisit almost every scene in the preceding six books, so it was both retrospective and conclusion in one tome. Awesome!

Also, she spread the triumph around. It was great! Neville came completely into his own, winning even the admiration of his crotchety grandmother. And Luna shines as usual. And Mrs. Weasley kicks ass! And a number of people are redeemed for past failings.

Jo said in an interview about a year ago that the last word in the book was "scar." That, like so many of her comments in interviews, has proven to be less than the whole truth. I really admire the way she has protected her own secrets, even to the point of misdirecting her devoted fans.

I can hardly believe it's over. My kids grew up with this saga. We read our first one before the girls were in school! And now they have to muddle their way into adulthood without Harry. On the other hand, Chloe is already talking about re-reading the whole series.

For me, it's done. I know some people take consolation from having two movies still to come, but the movies have never been my thing. It's the end of an era.

The perils of Books on CD

Well, I have another week of work under my belt (and I received my first paycheck yesterday). I spent my commutes this week listening to a Jennifer Crusie romance novel*. This little experiment was a rousing success in one respect: I actually found myself getting irritated that there were so few traffic jams this week!

On the con side, I was wishing for traffic jams this week! I think maybe this is working too well...

Also, I must look like a lunatic to the drivers around me, laughing out loud as I scoot down the freeway.

* For any who are interested, the book is Anyone But You, and it turned out to be a series romance I had read before. I kept thinking it sounded familiar, so I finally went and looked on my "keeper" shelf. Sure enough, there it was. It's a pretty entertaining novella.