Wise words from unschooling dad Brad Holcomb
"I now understand that talking interrupts the flow of feeling. If I'm talking about my feelings (talking to myself, or to others), describing them, putting them in words, telling the story of what's going on inside of me, I'm not really FEELING. The talking is an avoidance measure that lessens the [natural flow of feelings]. It increases resistance. I had always defended my blabber blabber as being Good For The Relationship. After all, everyone says that partners need to talk, right? And I was *so* good at talking. I got it from my parents, and their parents, etc. It's in my DNA story... I have words. LOTS of words. The Gift of Gab, some call it.
"My personal breakthrough involved taking a [short-term] personal Vow of Silence... What I found was that I had a 40-year backlog of feelings...
"The more I drop out of words, and the less I force my words onto others against their will, the *better* I can *feel*. That's why, today, I consider 'feeling better' to mean the same thing as 'feeling MORE'."
From Peaceful Partnerships
Mojo Brew bio
8 months ago
3 comments:
I'm not talking, I'm feeling this comment. Can you feel my vibes? Brad is onto something.
My momma always said, "You can't hear with your mouth open."
It is a bit ironic that she always had to dominate any conversation but that doesn't negate the validity of the satement.
I just joined the PP list and am just loving Brad's posts.
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