Easy unschooling

In response to my Hidden rules post, Arun (writer and dad of two seriously cute smaller unschoolers) asked:

are you saying it doesn't get any easier???
please say it aint true!

It ain't true! But then again, it is true.

The longer we unschool, the more confident I am of our path. That makes everything easier, and the days are long gone when I had to (literally) stop to ponder my every response to MJ and Chloe in light of our new unschooling attitudes. I usually know without having to think about it much what the unschooling response to any given situation is.

But being confident of our path doesn't mean I can close my eyes and walk it. Knowing the response I want to give doesn't squash every lesser impulse. I am anal exquisitely synchronized, somewhat self-absorbed, a latent control freak, and rather mouthy. Unschooling might have given me some insight into those traits and the harm they can do to my kids, but it hasn't changed those traits. I'm still me. And every so often, especially during stressful times, I need to give my unschooling a tuneup so I can get back to a more respectful place.

But beyond that, I think one of the Best Things about unschooling is that it continually challenges us to see how much better life can be. By shedding the superficial requirements of traditional parenting—the schooling, and the rules, and the nos, and the shoulds—we discovered so much more was possible than we'd thought, in terms of relationships and family happiness and discovery and accomplishment.

And then came the time when we strove to improve our social life. We discovered a whole new world of friends and fun.

It makes me wonder about the next level. Is there more? There just might be more! Maybe I can boost us up into that next level by making a lot of small gestures (not yelling about the cap of my face cleanser) or large ones (arranging yet another unschooler roadtrip, even though Frank and I are tired and money is tight).

Bottom line: I believe in being attentive to my parenting, in continuing to assess and improve. And as life unfolds, I continue to get lots of opportunities to do that.