Getting in the spirit... or trying to

Tom pointed out tonight that our annual Christmas Eve celebration at the beach is but nine days away. Holy crap! I guess I'd better find some holiday spirit. I'll start by finally doing the Christmas meme from Frank's blog.

1. Real tree or artificial? Real. Sheared Douglas Fir, always. But we had an artificial one in Florida the winter we spent there, and it's one of my favorites in memory. We didn't have our decorations with us, so we decked it with paper chains and kid art and just whatever we had around the condo. It was quirky and fun, very personal.

2. When do you put up the tree? Often, the weekend after Thanksgiving. This year, we still don't have one. It keeps getting put off for one reason or another. I'm trying to talk the girls into an alternative tree -- maybe we could just decorate Max and make him Guardian of the Gifts -- but they aren't going for it.

3. When do you take down the tree? The last couple of years, we've done it on January 1 or 2. I like that. (Fredian slip note: I typed "July" instead of "January" there at first. lol)

4.Wrapping paper or gift bags? Paper. Gift bags are for wimps! Just kidding; I might be resorting to a few gift bags myself this busy year.

5. When do you start Christmas shopping? I at least start thinking about it in October, although I often don't get going until November. This year, I did one burst of shopping in November, one last Saturday, and the rest is still to come. I'm so late!

6. Who is the hardest person to buy for? It varies. Chloe often doesn't have much of a wishlist. Frank can be tough 'cause he tends to want expensive things. (Does anybody have a Subzero fridge they want to donate?) My mom. Nephew Brian, 'cause I don't have much practice buying for teen boys.

7. Easiest person to buy for? Myself. MJ (who often has a well developed wishlist).

8. Angel on top of the tree, or star? Angel. Mom and the girls picked it out when the girls were toddlers.

9. What is the worst Christmas gift you ever got? I can't think of one. People are always really good to me.

10. What is the best gift you received as a child? Hmm. My big brother gave me a doll-baby once; she was precious. And more generically, Mom always made my Christmas dreams come true, whatever they were.

11. What is your favorite food to eat at Christmas time? Pam's divinity.

12. What do you want for Christmas this year? I put together a little wishlist, but I don't have any one thing I'm longing for (much to Frank's chagrin).

Meltdown to motivation

We have too much stuff. Our house is bursting at the seams. This bothers some of us more than others. It bothers some not at all.

So, yesterday, as Frank was once again wading through stuff to get to a door, I decided (without thinking it through or stopping to wonder who had not slept much, who had not eaten, who was more frustrated than I thought, and who was perhaps exceedingly poised to melt down due to several intense workweeks in a row) that we were all feeling mellow and now might be a good time to discuss it. I started off chirpy and things went downhill from there. There was yelling, there were tears. I lost it worst of all and distributed my crap to the others in shamefully large helpings.

But by the end of the day, we had come up with a plan. I share it here, untested, in case it helps somebody else avoid the crappy part.

First, we each picked one or two things about the state of the house that are really important to us.

• Frank - clear walkways and having a place at the table to eat
• Ronnie - clean sinks and having a comfortable place to sit down in the livingroom (our main hanging-out space)
• MJ - having a clean glass in the cupboard, every time
• Chloe - having nobody walk on her things and having people ask before entering her room

We call them our "Tops."

In keeping with the unschooling tradition of "If it bothers you, take care of it yourself," we are each responsible for our own Tops. But we are also entitled to our Tops and can ask for/expect help in achieving them as needed. So, for example, MJ will monitor the inventory of glasses, but if Chloe has a bunch in her room, MJ can ask her to bring them up to the dishwasher (or she can ask for permission to go in and get them herself). Also, we'll be supplementing our supply of glasses today. And if Frank is taking out the trash and can't get to the door without walking on MJ and Chloe's latest project, he can ask them to move their stuff (satisfying two Tops in one).

As I said, it's untested, but I like it because nobody is responsible for *everything* (and I think Frank and I both felt we were previously). Plus, each person's Tops are completely reasonable things to wish for, and we all see that. I mean, nobody is asking for the house to be Queen Elizabeth-ready at all times. We just want to be able to live.

The second thing we did was to schedule a weekly trip to the Goodwill. I will be going every Saturday morning, as needed, for as long as it's needed, and we'll each add items to the weekly donation pile/bag/box as we encounter them. No need for a Clean Sweep (which alway strikes me as terribly intimidating and downright cruel). Instead, it'll be a gradual easing of the Stuff Overload.

There you have it. We'll see how it goes.

Friday fill-in

1. Friends forever.

2. I expect continued good health; it's better than the alternative.

3. I'm ready for some football.

4. New Mexico pines in the sunshine is one of my favorite perfumes or aftershaves or smells.

5. The oldest ornament I have is probably one of the ones that Rosie made.

6. Take some unschoolers and some talks and some funshops and some pure happiness and some dancing and some pomegranate martinis and one beloved Conference Diva, mix it all together and you have LIFE is Good!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to (dare I say it?) an early trip home, tomorrow my plans include tree obtention and some work, and Sunday, I want to hang out with the Minshulls, except Scott, who is no doubt missing the rain/snow nearly as much as he misses all of us!

ALABBD: W is for whining

It's that time again, people. I almost forgot.

I'm not feeling so put upon this month. But there's always something to whine about.


Work
I've been putting in lots (LOTS) of hours. It's going well and I've once again survived the effects of previous procrastination. But I sure am seeing a lot of that place and not much of my favorite people.


War
Yes, it is (they are) still there. Latest Iraq casualty counts


Weather
Snow in the forecast. May I just say: UGH. I'm too busy for this crap.


Wuss
Blagojevich


W
Rachel's Lame Duck Watch videos

What a hoot

Some Hooter girls wishing Marty a happy 90th. There are more girls where he's gazing (in case you had any doubt).

Easy unschooling

In response to my Hidden rules post, Arun (writer and dad of two seriously cute smaller unschoolers) asked:

are you saying it doesn't get any easier???
please say it aint true!

It ain't true! But then again, it is true.

The longer we unschool, the more confident I am of our path. That makes everything easier, and the days are long gone when I had to (literally) stop to ponder my every response to MJ and Chloe in light of our new unschooling attitudes. I usually know without having to think about it much what the unschooling response to any given situation is.

But being confident of our path doesn't mean I can close my eyes and walk it. Knowing the response I want to give doesn't squash every lesser impulse. I am anal exquisitely synchronized, somewhat self-absorbed, a latent control freak, and rather mouthy. Unschooling might have given me some insight into those traits and the harm they can do to my kids, but it hasn't changed those traits. I'm still me. And every so often, especially during stressful times, I need to give my unschooling a tuneup so I can get back to a more respectful place.

But beyond that, I think one of the Best Things about unschooling is that it continually challenges us to see how much better life can be. By shedding the superficial requirements of traditional parenting—the schooling, and the rules, and the nos, and the shoulds—we discovered so much more was possible than we'd thought, in terms of relationships and family happiness and discovery and accomplishment.

And then came the time when we strove to improve our social life. We discovered a whole new world of friends and fun.

It makes me wonder about the next level. Is there more? There just might be more! Maybe I can boost us up into that next level by making a lot of small gestures (not yelling about the cap of my face cleanser) or large ones (arranging yet another unschooler roadtrip, even though Frank and I are tired and money is tight).

Bottom line: I believe in being attentive to my parenting, in continuing to assess and improve. And as life unfolds, I continue to get lots of opportunities to do that.

The hits just keep on coming

I've added a bunch of new links to my Unschooler Blogs list in the sidebar. Some of those have been on my to-do list for I-don't-want-to-think-about-how-long.

Is your blog missing? It's probably because I've never found your blog, probably through no fault of your own. Leave me a comment and I'll put you on my new to-do list. :-)

Hidden rules

I was innocently taking a shower the other day when I discovered that my face cleanser had been used by someone else. This is "allowed," but I felt irritated nevertheless. Upon examination, I realized the source of this irritation: there was a minute amount of cleanser on the cap. It bothered me so much that I actually considered summoning the culprit right then and there to demand that more care be taken in future.

(Ahem. Who's anal? Me? Couldn't be me.)

This kind of, um, specificity on my part is something the girls have had to live with their whole lives, and my transition to no-rules unschooling mom doesn't mean that I haven't made a whole slew of expectations mighty clear to everyone in the house. They are our hidden rules, and we've always had them.

Back in the dim time, when the girls were very small, I was feeling self-righteous about how easy the girls had it, how few rules they were expected to follow, and "we certainly ask little enough of them." To prove my point, I proceeded to write down every rule I could think of, expecting to wind up with about a dozen.

Well, folks, the list was loooooong. I probably had 50 rules that I expected these two tiny little girls to not only know but live by each and every minute of their lives. It was an eye opener: a little exercise that helped me see better.

These days, we have no rules. In theory, all of our rules were easily tossed out in favor of the application of common sense in individual situations. But those expectations of mine... Those are still around and probably not hidden well enough. And why should they be? you might ask. After all, individually they seem so harmless—things like "I expect the scissors to be returned to the drawer after use" and "I expect dishes to be carried to the sink and preferably put into the dishwasher" and "I expect the lid of my face cleanser to be left as nice as it was when I used it."

Well, there is harm. We end up with Ronnie cast as Demanding Arbiter of What Is Good Enough, and MJ, Chloe, and Frank cast as They Who Never Quite Measure Up. In other words, there's a dictator and the dictated-to. That's not what respect and acceptance look like.

Unfortunately, there is no easy way to exterminate my internal Demanding Arbiter. That happens one incident at a time, with a deep breath or a bitten tongue or an "erase, erase, erase" (our longtime Get Out of Jerkiness Free card). And for every time I squelch the impulse to complain/nudge/remind/demand/scream, there are probably a dozen times (or more) when I give into it and don't even notice.

Fortunately for me, my family knows I'm always trying.

House Work

Despite the equality advances made in recent years, men continue to be (considered) the primary breadwinners, and women continue to be (considered) the primary childrearers. In the vast majority of unschooling families, the mom is home with the kids while the dad goes outside the home to work.

There are exceptions, of course, and in our house, we've pretty much turned that on its ear. It means wonderful things for our family—my kids have a wonderful relationship with their father (one of the best men I've ever known), and they get to see alternative gender roles in action and working well.

It also means sometimes confusing things for Frank and me. We were raised on those traditional gender roles, after all, and we occasionally bump up against them. And the alternative gender roles are sometimes not entirely comfortable. I have a strong desire to be the primary childrearer, for example, in addition to having an abiding passion for unschooling, so I continue to insist on have input into what goes on here during the day. I am gone all day, though, so Frank and the girls by necessity and desire take point on the unschooling.

But the primary place where we have conflict is over the house. I'm the woman and this is my house. That's in my head somewhere. And then I come home to whatever state the house is in after a day of busy learning.

Lots of unschoolers write messages and blog posts about the frustration dads can feel when they arrive home to a house that looks like a tornado hit, and Jon Gold gave a highly entertaining talk that touched on the subject at LIFE is Good 2008. It's the same for us, except that I'm female. I can relate. It can be really hard to come home to the remains of the day, and I find myself thinking nasty thoughts that don't really belong in the head of an unschooling parent. Or of any parent, for that matter.

Time for some house Work.

Nasty thought: Frank and the girls don't care about me enough to clean up.

Is it true? No.
Am I absolutely sure that it is true? Not even close.
How does it make me feel to believe that? In a word, crappy. Also, listless, overwhelmed, and lonely.
Who would I be without that thought? A better mom and wife. Less bitchy. Probably the resident, both in thought and reality, of a cleaner house.

Turn it around:

• I don't care about me enough to clean up. Eww. I hope that one's not true.
• I don't care about Frank and the girls enough to clean up. Double eww. It's a horribly negative slant on basic laziness, but there are shades of truth there.
• Frank and the girls do care about me enough to clean up. This is definitely true. But they usually don't clean up anyway, so there must be other reasons. Usually, it's 'cause they're still using the things that look like mess to me, or they think they might someday (in the dim and unknown future) want to use those things again. Or it's basic laziness, which I am hardly in a position to judge.
• Frank and the girls (and I) don't care about the mess enough to clean up. Bingo. Dammit.

Katie says that if you really want to do something, you'll do it, and if you're not doing it, then you must not really want to do it. While I tend to acknowledge the real obstacles of life more than she does, I've found it to be true for me a lot of the time. So many of the petty frustrations in my life—and, subsequently, so many all of my bouts with depression—have their roots in my constant tendency to choose the pleasures of the moment over the pleasures one derives from steady maintenance of home/job/cars/life.

I envy people who have a clean house to come to, who can invite guests over without needing at least a couple of days to prepare, who can give someone a lift without feeling the need to apologize for the state of the car, who never have to work all through the weekend to catch up on procrastinated tasks. And yet, when it comes down to those momentary choices, I continue to choose the fun/easy/pleasant/relaxing thing.

It's not all bad. As a direct result of this pattern, my life has been full-to-bursting with fun, easy, pleasant, and relaxing moments. But I'm ready for more maintenance.

Scott Noelle told me at Live and Learn that my kids take their housework cues from me. And he's right: for their whole lives, I have regarded chores as Tasks to Dread. Little wonder that they share that attitude.

The other thing he said is that if I can begin to enjoy living in a clean house even before I have one—much the way one enjoys a Christmas present even before it's been opened—it will put me in a more positive, powerful, energized place, and that, from there, making the choice to Do This One Thing Now will be easier.

Here's hoping.

Unexpected benefits of unschooling

My eyes are open to the world. I don't know if I'm learning more than I used to, but now I'm aware of it and enjoying it.

We've found a huge, varied, inspiring, and always entertaining pack of friends.

At about midnight one night last week, our next-door neighbor called to see if the girls could babysit while she took her husband to the ER. (He continues to feel the effects of a bout of encephalitis last year.) She knew she could do this because our lights are usually still on at midnight and our girls usually don't have to get up early in the morning. She was able to stay with him all night, knowing her kids were safe.

Related to that: When I stay at work until 9, 10, 11, even 12, I still get to see my kids when I get home. Chloe and I have been playing piano together at midnight. I'm not sure the neighbors are as enthused with this benefit as we are.

We don't get sick very often. When the girls were in school, it seemed like somebody in the family was sick every week, and that's not much of an exaggeration.

We have freedom to travel when the time is right. (I'll never forget Everett High refusing to excuse Chiara when we wanted to take her through the southwest. Most frustrating. So she had a couple of extra weeks of U.S. history from a book, but she's never been to an Anasazi ruin or visited the Old West. Real sensible.)

The house is always in such a state that I have a real opportunity for personal growth.

Friday fill-in

1. Snow in the Siskiyous after Christmas would be a very sad development for a pack of unschoolers I know.

2. I'm looking forward to being productive.

3. Appicciacaticcio is the best Italian word ever! (means "sticky")

4. One of my favorite old tv shows is Mad About You.

5. I'm done with umm... nothing?

6. The most enjoyable thing around the holidays is the week after Christmas. It's quiet, all the hard work (aka shopping and festivities) is done, and the office is deserted. Plus, this year I get some time alone.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to reading and sleeping, tomorrow my plans include working, and Sunday, I want to get tons of work done!

Thursday 13

13 Random Thoughts

1. I get more frustrated with Seattle traffic when it's moving along than I do when it's stop-and-go. I think it's because the left-lane hogs are *so* obvious then.

This does not mean that I will be shifting my commute into true rush hour, however. I do hate to dawdle when I'm behind the wheel.

2. Dawdle? Is that right? What an odd word. (Yeah, that's right. I just looked it up. But the etymology is mostly unknown.)

3. I always forget about link tracking. A few weeks ago, I blogged a link to the Web site for a store that I visited in a professional capacity, just 'cause I loved the store. Well, I found out yesterday that the store owners followed that ol' Zombie Princess trail and found my personal blog. Oops. I'm so glad I only had nice things to say about them! I definitely was not wearing my professional hat when I wrote that post, though. They were entertained. (Just in case: Hi, Roy! Hi, Diane!)

4. Some people think "idealogues" like me are distressed by Obama's cabinet choices. I saw him called a "closet centrist" today. Sheesh. Do they really think we couldn't tell he was a centrist?! Obviously, they have no idea what a truly leftist candidate would campaign for. Perhaps they've forgotten all his talk of finding common ideals and middle ground and how we're not red states or blue states but the United States.

Weren't they listening? Or do they just think we weren't?

I'll try not to generalize for the other 66,882,229 (or so) people who voted for him, but as for me, he is doing exactly what I expected and hoped for. I may not love all of his cabinet choices, and I'm waiting with some interest to see where he'll go for some of the open slots (e.g., Education), but the general direction he's taking is one I can get fully behind.

5. When I was a wee lass of about 12, I took some piano lessons. Last night, Chloe asked to learn one of the few songs I remember from that time. It's a nocturne and kind of a fun song to play, because it's really pretty easy but it sounds good. I hear she did some practicing on Frank's electronic keyboard today and got a totally different sound.

6. In other Chloe news, when I left this morning, I discovered a note taped to the front door. She had made me lunch! She wanted to spare me yet another day eating a slice of pizza (the quickest, easiest, cheapest food item available in the MS cafeterias, and my default choice). Nice start to the day, having her take care of me like that.

7. I have had "Against All Odds" stuck in my head for three days. It's not even my favorite Phil Collins song. That would be "In the Air Tonight." (Drum solo, baby!) Maybe I can switch to that one.

8. I still have my fingers crossed, Steph. And toes.

9. A small rant: "...cannot be achieved apart from reliance upon almighty God." So, Kentucky's answer to the religious, um, commitment that led to 9/11 was to fire back with an alternative religious commitment? Yeah, that's the ticket.

How many Supreme Court cases do these people have to lose before they get a clue that a statement like that has no place in American law? Even the conservative courts will throw it out.

Funny how Christians usually have no problem seeing a statement like that as a problem if it reads "almighty Allah" or "almighty Odin" or "almighty Goddess" or "almighty Buddha." And yet we have citizens and public officials who believe in each of those deities and who are subject to the very same Constitutional protections (and public safeguards) that they are.

As for me, I have a t-shirt that reads, "I pledge allegiance to the Earth—one planet, many gods—and to the universe in which she spins." You should see the looks I get when I wear it.

10. Ack. I have not blogged about our weekend. Well, it was fabulous, replete with friends and food and dancing ducks and daily Charades. I have videos. Will I ever get them posted? Who knows? You're all still waiting anxiously for clips from Chloe's play six months ago, right?

11. I got to do some indexing last night. For those who don't know, indexing is the process of writing index entries which combine to form the index of a book or Help file. Yes, someone creates those suckers by hand, and I am one of those someones. I'm damned good at it, too. I indexed about 600 files in about six hours, and that includes editing them all together. How did I do this? Well, it comes down to experience. I can hold an entire index in my brain and write index entries that slot together slick as you please. Some of my dearest friends have the same ability.

Indexers of the world, UNITE!

12. I can spend hours wading through the always colorful histories of various royal families. The latest tour worked through the Dutch and French and Spanish lines, which are all connected, of course, if you go back just a bit, either by marriage or by blood.

It really wouldn't be that hard for a girl to find a prince to marry. There are dozens of them.

13. The other song that's been stuck in my head is "Way Back Into Love" from the Music and Lyrics soundtrack. Sweet movie. Catchy songs. I think we watched it Sunday night, so maybe that song has been in my brain even longer than "Against All Odds."

False alarm

If you use a Computer Associates anti-virus program and have been getting virus warnings after visiting my blog, never fear. Some YouTube videos, including the Spearhead one I had featured, have been triggering false positives. They are not actually infected.

I'll put the video back up in a couple of days after CA fixes the problem. It's just too scary seeing those warnings come up. :-)

A new low in consumerism

I'm sure many of you have heard about the man who was trampled to death on Black Friday, an event which made a triple entendre out of the day's coy name. I agree with this guy that it is time to stop the insanity.

Friday fill-in

1. My stomach is happy and not overly full.
2. Pie is what I ate the most of on Thursday.
3. The yard work will still be there in the Spring. And maybe in the Summer, knowing us.
4. In my happy place is where I'd rather be at any given time.
5. The smell of melting butter reminds me of Nina's Chess Pie, even when really it's Frank's roux for shrimp bisque.
6. More cowbell is what I need right now!
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to hanging out with the Golds and eating the aforementioned shrimp bisque, tomorrow my plans include hanging out with the Golds and the Boswells, and Sunday I want to get a jumpstart on my workweek.

Thursday 13

Thirteen People and Things I Am Grateful For This Year It's kind of obvious, but it had to be done. 1. The continuing health and happiness of my family, and the huge joy they bring into my life. 2. My friendship with Steph, all 20+ years of it. 3. Judy and Chrissy, for taking care of Marty. 4. My job and the benefits it provides. 5. That Jalen, one of the neighbor kids, is alive. He accidentally hanged himself a few weeks ago, horsing around with his brother, and had to be transported to Harborview. But he's okay now. 6. Mary Gold. Her writing and her efforts in organizing the LIFE is Good Unschooling Conference and her annual Non-Cons are largely responsible for the good unschooling life we're living now. Plus, she's just a good friend to all of us. 7. Kelly Lovejoy, for giving me the opportunity to stretch my wings and discover some new old friends. 8. Caren, for the drumming. 9. Randi, for listening and for letting us feel a part of her journey. 10. I didn't need a root canal. 11. My new, Europe-inspired perspective on American prices. (They're really not that high.) 12. Ireland's ability to live up to my high and exceedingly romantic expectations. It would have hurt to let go of my Ireland-related daydreams. 13. Barack Obama won the election, and I have some (cautious) pride in our country again. Happy Thanksgiving!

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Renewal

I think this is one of the best things I've ever written:

We have no idea what our kids might accomplish if encouraged, and it's not our job to make them "face reality." When offered the Great Gift of a glimpse into their dreams and wishes, we don't have to be their voice of reason or the rain on their parade. We just have to say, "Oh, cool! How can I help?"

It's from this February 2007 post about the movie "Accepted" and unschooling.

Living up to those words isn't always easy. I struggle with very strong impulses to make sure my kids are always properly informed. Or at least that's the lie I tell myself. What it really is, is magical thinking: on some level, I believe that if I point out every potential downside to a plan, it might somehow keep them safe or make them more successful. How silly!

What I am really doing with all those warnings is discouraging them and disrespecting them and making them sad.

I bet you can all relate. Think back for just a bit, and I'm sure you'll remember a moment when something you said made the light go out of a kid's eyes. Or maybe you were the kid. Not a very pleasant memory, is it?

Let's all resolve to put an end to moments like that, k?

Movie review: Hancock

Spoilers follow.

I wanted to like this movie. The previews intrigued me enough that I chose watching it over reading my book last night. I guess I don't exactly regret the decision, but I sure came away disappointed.

The first part of the movie is really good. I was enjoying Hancock's transformation from drunken, abrasive not-so-super-hero to fledgling do-gooder. Will Smith's performance through these parts was nuanced and interesting, and Jason Bateman was a good foil.

And then the movie took a left turn. I had just barely begun to enjoy the all new Hancock when the whole story line with Charlize Theron picked up. And even that I was trying to go along with—or I was at least curious where they were going with it—when the movie took another left turn, and we've suddenly got an ill-defined arch-nemesis and historical background on the characters that was, well, kind of silly. (Question: After listening to the hospital conversation between John and Mary, why, exactly, is she supposed to have hated him? Yeah, yeah, she was scared, but they wrote scenes for an angry woman, not a scared one. And then she had no reason to be angry.)

It seemed like nobody knew quite what to do with the movie after the setup. I know what I would have done: there was a wonderful developing-character story in the making there, and I really wanted to see what that character was going to make of the world. Instead, I got a boring battle and an unsatisfying conclusion.

Maybe it's time for some fanfiction.

Sharing corner

Some unschooling highlights from the blogosphere:

Flo's handy list of upcoming unschooler events

Linda's article on "late" readers

Gail's envy-inspiring photos from ARGH

Caren's lovely, "ordinary" day

20 questions

Self-tagged from Frank.

The rules:
A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question.

B) Tag 8 people to answer the questions. MJ, Chloe, and six volunteers.

1. How many songs are on your iPod?
It is a sign of my comfort level with my iPod that I thought I was going to have to call MJ to find out how to find out. But it's right there in plain sight! I have 310 songs on my iPod. That I only have 310 songs on my iPod is a sign of my inability/unwillingness to devote any time to loading songs on my iPod.

2. What music would you want played at your funeral?
Umm... "Exactly" by Amy Steinberg. Oh wait....

How about "Satisfaction"? :-)

Seriously, I don't really want a funeral. If my family wants to have one, I want them to play whatever will make them remember the good times.

Update: "Hells Bells" just came on my iPod. That one might be fun.

3. What magazines do you have subscriptions to?
I think "Gourmet" is the only one we're getting right now. I get massively hungry once a month.

4. What are your favorite scents?
Bread baking. Lilacs on the tree. Spring rain. Baby.

5. If you had a million dollars that you could only spend on yourself, what would you do with it?
Quit my job and hang out with my family, at home or on the road. I fantasize about time, not stuff.

But I'd definitely get my very own computer. And maybe an office to keep it in.

6. What is your theme song?
It takes a playlist:
- "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks
- "Brass in Pocket" by The Pretenders
- "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" by Cyndi Lauper
- "Head Over Feet" by Alanis Morissette
- "I Fall to Pieces" by Pasty Cline
- "I Try" by Macy Gray
- "It's Money That I Love" by Randy Newman
- "Sisters Are Doin' It For Themselves" by Aretha and Annie
- "Suddenly I See" by KT Tunstall
- "Sympathy for the Devil" by The Rolling Stones
- "Tell It Like It Is" by Aaron Neville
- "(I Used to Care But) Things Have Changed" by Bob Dylan
- "Walking on Sunshine" by Katrina & The Waves
- "You Shook Me All Night Long" by AC/DC

7. Do you trust easily?
People? Yes. People in positions of authority? No.

8. Do you generally think before you act, or act before you think?
Yes. No. Yes. I think so. Sometimes. Maybe.

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
What Frank said.

10. Do you have a good body-image?
Mostly. I still see potential, anyway. :-)

12. How do you spend your social networking (Facebook, etc.) time?
Blogging and e-mail.

13. What have you been seriously addicted to lately?
Blogging. Reading. Carbs. And I'm a coffee drinker now, although it takes about a quarter cup to wire me up for the whole day.

14.
Original: What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
If we stretch it a bit and say that Frank tagged me, well, I think he's one of the best people I know.

Frank's: Why do people still believe in the supernatural?
Fear and comfort, not necessarily at the same time.

15. What’s the last song that got stuck in your head?
I have had "Preacher Man" and "Pilot of the Airwaves" stuck in my head for YEARS. They're always right there.

16. What’s your favorite item of clothing?
My "Serenity" t-shirt.

17. Do you think Rice Krispies are yummy?
With enough sugar, yep.

18. What would you do if you saw $100 lying on the ground?
I'd spend it on books.

19. What items could you not go without during the day?
Items? My inhaler. Something comfortable to sit on. That might be it.

Being without books for very long would hurt.

20. What should you be doing right now?
Either working or driving home.

Monday Memories

When MJ was not quite 4 and Chloe was 2, we moved to Destin, Florida. We were there for six months, staying in a rented condo on the stunning beach. There was a pool, which we had essentially to ourselves all winter, and both girls learned to swim while we were there. In fact, by the time spring rolled around and the tourists started returning, they were both little fish. Frank and I would lounge in the adjacent hot tub, while our tiny little girls jumped, splashed, and swam in the pool.

It was funny to watch the reactions of the older tourists, especially to Chloe. As she would toddle close to the pool, they would begin twitching with the need to go save her, looking at Frank and me with open mouths and raised eyebrows as we kicked back in the hot tub, smiling calmly. Then Chloe would fling herself off the edge in a high-flying cannonball, paddle to the steps, and do it all over again.

The Spring Breakers provided some entertainment, too. There was one time when a couple of college guys were in the hot tub with us, each with an open beer. MJ came over to the side of the tub and went into obvious cannonball position. We hurried to stop her. "She's fiiiiine," one of the guys said, clearly thinking such a little tyke couldn't do much damage. Well, she was an expert by then, and she drowned everything: us, guys, beers, nearby belongings. "That's a good cannonball," he pronounced. Indeed.

O Canaaaa-dians

Michael Franti and Spearhead (recently featured on this blog) will be
in Vancouver on December 30th.

You wouldn't want a couple of houseguests by any chance, wouldja, wouldja, huh?

Friday fill-in

1. The last band I saw live was a group of guys playing traditional Irish music in a pub in Westport, County Mayo. They were a somewhat motley bunch, but they could play like nobody's business. One guy had longish hair that he managed to set on fire (just a little) by leaning into a candle during a particularly lively number.
2. What I look forward to most on Thanksgiving is Papa's pesto and Mom's pie and hearing what all the kids are grateful for this year.
3. My Christmas/holiday shopping is started but probably won't be completed until the last minute.
4. Thoughts of Smarties fill my head, because MJ the Heartless refuses to go to the grocery store for me so they can fill my stomach instead.
5. I wish I could wear bells wherever I go. But they'd probably drive me crazy.
6. Bagpipes remind me of my great-grandma; they were always her favorite part of the parade.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to the usual, tomorrow my plans include working, and Sunday, I want to get lots of work done so I can have a relaxed holiday weekend!

Thursday 13

A Thursday Thirteen Twofer:26 Movie Moments that Make Me Smile Hugely (mild spoilers may follow) 1. "Who wants pie?" It Could Happen to You 2. "I Will Survive." The Replacements 3. "Write that down." Blast from the Past 4. "Baptism!" O Brother Where Art Thou 5. "He dies?" Shakespeare in Love 6. "This could very well be the stupidest person on the face of the earth. Perhaps we should shoot him." Ruthless People 7. "All You Need Is Love." Love Actually 8. "How do you think I feel? Betrayed, bewildered..." and "Are you afraid of my Guatemalan-ness?" The Birdcage 9. "Sweet mystery of life, at last I've found thee." Young Frankenstein 10. "I trust I need no introduction." Interview with the Vampire 11. "No more goat soup!" and "Americans." The Mummy 12. "You are drunk, and when you are drunk, you forget that I AM IN CHARGE!" and "I dwell in darkness without you and it went away?!" Willow 13. "Nuclear wessels." Star Trek IV 14. "You want a beer, you get your own beer." and "Naturals. My God, every one of you, naturals... We're gonna f**king die." Captain Ron 15. "But why is the rum gone?" Pirates of the Caribbean 16. "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means." The Princess Bride 17. "Well, you can do whatever you want to us, but we're not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America. Gentlemen!" and "Germans?" Animal House 18. "The light is green." Happy Texas 19. "Damn you! I'm not an actor, I'm a movie star!" My Favorite Year 20. "The Donger need food." Sixteen Candles 21. "Little Latin boy in drag, why are you crying?" and "That is Miss Anne Baxter in the Ten Commandments and those are the moves." To Wong Foo 22. "I've been burned by you before." Beauty and the Beast 23. "Walk Like a Man." Heart and Souls 24. "Snap out of it!" and "I'm so confused." Moonstruck 25. "I thought you were Joe, Jr." and "Get down on one knee; it's more romantic." While You Were Sleeping 26. "We'll see what the man's sellin'. THEN we'll shoot 'im." Secondhand Lions Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Musical smiles

Thanks, Jorene!

Marty's birthday

Marty turned 90 yesterday. Frank called to wish him a happy one, but he was sleeping, so Frank chatted with Judy instead. In an IM conversation, I asked Frank how Marty is doing. This was his reply:

Fading would be my best word choice. Judy sez he no longer helps at all with transitions. Sleeping a lot. She's looking into getting some kinda lift-thingy which is apparently the way to go when you aren't strong enuf to move the subject all on your own. Got a "cold" he can't completetely shake. But basically, he's mostly the same, just ... less there... But he still enjoys chatting and tv and getting outside. Not too bad, all things considered.

Chincredible

MSN's teaser:

I knew that chin immediately. Do you? Click the image for the big reveal.

Water

I feel like blogging more but can think of nothing to say. "Water" keeps featuring in the titles I come up with. Maybe I'm thirsty.

On an unrelated subject, I've just eaten half a box of Aplets & Cotlets for dinner. Yum! One of Washington's finest products! That I managed to do this even though Frank and MJ are watching the remake of "Dawn of the Dead" downstairs, and I have seen and heard enough gushing brains to make me a little queasy, is a testament to the fine work done by Liberty Orchards for the past 80 years or so. Their history is fascinating and can be found here.

Chloe has vanished into her room, having discovered some forgotten treasures in my (deep) closet, which used to be her bedroom. I finally cleaned it out some last summer and organized her things-left-behind, but I guess I hadn't told her, because she was quite pleased when she went in there today. She found stuffed friends, the puppets she and MJ inherited from Lynn and me, various small mementos, and so on. It's like Christmas!

Earlier, she was rereading one of her books by Silver Ravenwolf, a magik/Wicca author, and was distressed to discover that Silver got her Norse mythology wrong. Chloe has done quite a bit of reading on/of Norse myths since the last time she read Silver's book, so she was able to immediately recognize the error when Silver said Freya was a moon goddess and Odin's wife. Not!

Me, I wouldn't have known the difference.

One of the concerns about homeschooling is that the kids will learn only what their parents know. Laughable concept to those of us living the life.

Another is that they will think only what their parents think. *snort* *snuffle* *guffaw* If that were true, most of my conversations with MJ in the past week could not have taken place, and the recent rather heated talk that MJ, Chloe, and I had about school would not have inspired me to introduce a talking stick into the mix. (We didn't have a talking stick handy, so we used my inhaler. This produced much laughter, but it did the job.)

How do I know what a talking stick is? I have no idea. I just picked it up somewhere. Maybe my kids told me, but I have the feeling the knowledge is older than they are. Maybe I saw one in a movie long ago. The closest I'd ever come to using one before this was passing around a little hacky-sack-type thing so a hearing-impaired coworker would know who was speaking.

Last night, Jon Stewart did this little "Devil Went Down to Georgia" thing to explain Georgia's runoff election process. MJ knew the song. How? I have no idea. Well, I have some idea: this is a woman with a serious passion for music. But this is also a 30-year-old novelty song! A country novelty song! Nevertheless, she got the joke.

Sandra Dodd has said that a lot of learning is about getting the joke, and vice versa.

Did you know I have a calm energy? Caren said so. It was news to me, but it's an interesting idea: Ronnie as calm person. Sometimes I probably manage it. And, hey, I have long fingernails now!

A new hopeful sign: Some abortion foes shifting focus
"...a growing number of antiabortion pastors, conservative academics and activists are setting aside efforts to outlaw abortion and instead are focusing on building social programs and developing other assistance for pregnant women to reduce the number of abortions."
Now maybe we can get something done.

Lieberman is being welcomed back into the fold. Ick.

Oops, gotta go, Chloe wants to use the computer. Later!

Maybe in 2010

We had thought that our Life After Europe would be somewhat calmer than our Life Before Europe. It's not working out that way. 2008 is definitely our year for socializing.

We've discovered community. I posted some about that here. It's wonderful and we love it, but because our community is spread out all across the freaking continent and in England and Australia, being with our community has meant quite a bit of traveling. Or they come and stay with us, so it means having houseguests. One or the other, every month this year.

Can you say "Busy!"? I knew you could.

And the thing is, it's so freaking fun, we can't say no. Over the course of the last year, each of us has had weary moments where we longed for a break. And then the next invite would arrive and we'd say, "Okay, after this, we'll rest." So here we are, with 12 months of socializing under our belts.

It's not like us, in case you didn't know. It seems like only yesterday that Frank and I were wishing we had more adult friends, MJ was wishing she had more teen friends, and Chloe, well, Chloe loves being alone, so never mind her.

I have friends who are into the Law of Attraction (aka "The Secret"). For some, it means opening themselves up to pursue/receive/achieve something they want, while for others it means they can have whatever they want just by believing they will get it. I don't have enough belief in the mystical to get behind either, really—or I have too much ego to relinquish credit for anything I've achieved—and it doesn't feel like what happened here anyway.

It was more like a snowball rolled down a snowy slope. It started with an e-mail message, I think: "Let's get together." And before I knew it, we had arrived at today, with 12 straight months of unschooler gatherings under our belts.

Pretty remarkable process.

So now we're thinking, well, after New Year's we can rest.

Hey, it could happen!

The Doings Report

A quiet week for us. Frank and MJ made the round-trip run to Corvallis in the rain, so Chloe is home. Both girls are working on NaNoWriMo and/or fretting about their wordcounts. Frank had his turn at the dentist. (Can you tell we have new insurance? We were insured before, but we hated the only dentist that was covered by our plan. This made for some serious dental avoidance.)

The sun came out Saturday! This was good news for our very soggy state. We had pretty good weather while were at the Hawks game Sunday, too, although it wasn't enough to boost the boys into winning. They sure put on a good show, though, keeping us on our feet, screaming, right up until Matt's (expletive deleted - gotta start cleaning up my blog rating again) interception killed their game-winning-touchdown drive with two minutes left.

Game Day Highlights:

• The helicopters that flew overhead (part of their Military Day observances), then disappeared into the mist-shrouded city beyond the stadium.
• The very football-savvy Seattle crowd. I am always impressed anew when we go to games. They are SO loud helping out the defense, but quiet way down when our offense is on the field. Pretty cool. And we still (even after a season such as this) have the highest opponent-false-start count of any stadium in the league.

The MR2 had a visit to the shop for brakes and a new clutch. The price tag of this work was gut-wrenchingly high, but still so much cheaper than buying a new car, however tempting that might be from time to time. (We had a Corolla S as our loaner car. Lotta temptation in that little package!) And the clutch had a six-digit mileage count on it, so we can't complain too much.

Other than those things, all I can think of are the things I'm not getting done, mainly Christmas shopping, housework, and "enough" regular work. I think (hope) I am fast approaching that mystical place where the pressure I'm under causes me to undergo a sort of cellular transformation that allows me to achieve superhuman feats of accomplishment.

Hey, it could happen!

Rating the blog

I tried the little blog-rating tool Mary featured on her blog. It gave me a PG rating for repeated use of the word "zombie" and one use of the word "torture."

Somehow it missed the post where I featured "fuck" and several posts where I used "shit" and a whole bunch of posts where I used "hell."

It'll be interesting to see what it thinks of my blog now. :-)

Update one minute later: Yep, that did the trick. I'm rated "R" now.

Being unreasonable

This post was inspired by Idzie and is part of my Act Like a Big Baby Day celebration, since today I don't have to be politically correct.

So, the topic is Veterans Day. Every year, this holiday inspires a messy stew of mixed feelings in me, and every year I bite my tongue. Not this year.

I don't have a problem with honoring our veterans. There are some veterans in my life whom I honor very much. However, I am at root a pacifist, and I find our twice-annual national recognition of this particular group of people a little distressing. My discomfort has nothing to do with their service; it doesn't matter to me how long they served, whether they served in peacetime or wartime or both, whether they lost friends or limbs or just a little time.

What bothers me is that they are the only group we honor, and I think that makes a terrible statement about what we value in this country.

Where is our holiday for honoring people who serve in other ways, the firefighters and cops and EMTs? These people face horrors daily, for decades, and they, too, lose comrades in arms.

Where is our holiday for honoring the peaceful people who protest our country's more outrageous acts? They, too, sacrifice time, money, comfort, safety, their freedom, and sometimes their lives.

Where is our holiday for honoring people who choose low-paying jobs in nursing, education, charity work, and so on, just because they care? They, too, set aside personal advantages and work for the common good.

Twice a year our president (of either party) makes a speech thanking veterans for their service, and all the media outlets rush to cover it, and all our schoolchildren are forced to participate in assemblies, and many of us break out our flags and our gratitude for a few hours. And that's okay with me, it really is (well, except for the forcing part). I wouldn't want to live in the world we'd have if not for the people who fought in most of our past wars. I don't really want to find out what the world would be like if we got rid of our armed forces (intriguing idea though it is).

But neither do I want to define patriotism as carrying a weapon or dropping a bomb. We can do better than that! I can do better than that:

Patriotism is loving your country enough to take action.

Period.

Here are a dozen patriotic 'veterans' I am honoring today:
Daniel Shays
Sojourner Truth
William Lloyd Garrison
Elizabeth Blackwell
Alice Paul
Edward R. Murrow
Howard Zinn
John Taylor Gatto
Allison Krause
Crystal Lee Jordan
Michael J. Fox
will.i.am

Friday fill-in

1. Please feel free to do things my way.

2. When I write with a Sharpie I can't help sniffing it occasionally. (This came to mind because MJ recently made herself a little loopy by using one of those big fat Sharpies in an unventilated area.)

3. My favorite thing to cook is pasta. I don't even need sauce, just a little too much butter and a little too much salt.

4. Time to read is something I can't get enough of.

5. That's the thing I love most about being sick: I get to read.

6. The guy cruising along in the fast lane even when the rest of the freeway is empty always makes me think to myself, what the heck?

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to hanging out with Chloe, MJ, and Frank, tomorrow my plans include Christmas shopping and some time alone, and Sunday, I want to see a Seahawks victory at Qwest Field with Lori and Brian! In the sunshine! (Hey, it's not too much to ask!)

ALABBD

I hereby declare the second Friday of every month:


I'm tired of being a good little soldier. I'm tired of focusing on joy. I'm tired of being fair. I just want to be pouty and unreasonable.

And I don't think it's unreasonable to have one day a month for doing that!

So there.

Want to join in? Feel free to steal the above primitive image to use as a button on your sidebar. If you really want to get into it, link the image to this post, and leave me a comment so I know who's in the club.

Update 2/13: ALABBD is evolving. See here.

Thursday 13

13 Bananas

1. Your Average Banana:


2. Woody's Bananas:


3. Green Bananas:


4. Cheering Bananas:


5. Peppery Bananas:


6. Paradise Bananas:


7. Floral Bananas:

(Art by Lili Bernard)

8. Runty Bananas:


9. Chewy Bananas:


And then there are my favorites...

THE DESSERTS!

10. Split Bananas:


11. Foster's Bananas:


12. Chilly Bananas:


13. Crème de la Crème Bananas:

Did you know...

...Chloe (my youngest!) will get to vote in the next presidential election?

...I hate going to the dentist and often cry while I'm there? Yes, even for a cleaning.

...I haven't been to the gym since we got back from Europe? If I haven't done it by the end of this week, I'm going to schedule an appointment with a trainer. I always keep my appointments (even with the dentist).

...adapting US software documentation for use in Great Britain involves searching and replacing upwards of 500 terms, and about 3/5 of those involve changing "z" to "s"? Damn that Noah Webster.

...rain adds at least 20 minutes to my commute, even when no accidents have occurred? I don't know why. Seattle-area commuters drive in rain all the time; you'd think everybody would be used to it.

...a significant percentage of my blogging takes place when I have postponed my departure due to a traffic jam?

QE2 update

She ran aground yesterday. Did we jinx her? Sounds like us, since she suffered a mishap but probably only cosmetic damage.

But in more interesting news, she was on her last journey prior to her new life as a casino in Dubai. In other words, we got to witness one of her very last visits to Ireland.

The Doings Report

What we've been doing:

MJ - Lots of writing for NaNoWriMo. Researching poetry. Reading fanfiction. Texting with her friends. Getting a filling.

Chloe - In her own words.

Frank - Writing (but I don't know if I'm supposed to say what). Taking care of us. Watching football. Taking care of us some more. Fixing or arranging the fixing of cars. Running errands. And did I mention that he's been taking care of us?

Ronnie - Working. Reading. Watching football. Attending one-day-only Jury Duty (went through voir dire but had a high enough juror number that I didn't get seated - YAY!). Getting a crown prepped and spending days fiddling with the very annoying temp they put on (real one goes on in the morning). A bit of EVERYTHING this weekend.

All - Celebrating!

(Click the image to receive your very own copy of this sticker FREE.)

A letter to President Obama

This is attributed to Alice Walker, but I don't know if she really sent it. Either way, I like the sentiments.

Open Letter to Barack Obama

Dear Brother Obama,

You have no idea, really, of how profound this moment is for us. Us being the black people of the Southern United States. You think you know, because you are thoughtful, and you have studied our history. But seeing you deliver the torch so many others before you carried, year after year, decade after decade, century after century, only to be struck down before igniting the flame of justice and of law, is almost more than the heart can bear. And yet, this observation is not intended to burden you, for you are of a different time, and, indeed, because of all the relay runners before you, North America is a different place. It is really only to say: Well done.

We knew, through all the generations, that you were with us, in us, the best of the spirit of Africa and of the Americas. Knowing this, that you would actually appear, someday, was part of our strength. Seeing you take your rightful place, based solely on your wisdom, stamina and character, is a balm for the weary warriors of hope, previously only sung about.

I would advise you to remember that you did not create the disaster that the world is experiencing, and you alone are not responsible for bringing the world back to balance. A primary responsibility that you do have, however, is to cultivate happiness in your own life. To make a schedule that permits sufficient time of rest and play with your gorgeous wife and lovely daughters. And so on. One gathers that your family is large. We are used to seeing men in the White House soon become juiceless and as white-haired as the building; we notice their wives and children looking strained and stressed. They soon have smiles so lacking in joy that they remind us of scissors. This is no way to lead. Nor does your family deserve this fate.

One way of thinking about all this is: It is so bad now that there is no excuse not to relax. From your happy, relaxed state, you can model real success, which is all that so many people in the world really want. They may buy endless cars and houses and furs and gobble up all the attention and space they can manage, or barely manage, but this is because it is not yet clear to them that success is truly an inside job. That it is within the reach of almost everyone.

I would further advise you not to take on other people's enemies. Most damage that others do to us is out of fear, humiliation and pain. Those feelings occur in all of us, not just in those of us who profess a certain religious or racial devotion. We must learn actually not to have enemies, but only confused adversaries who are ourselves in disguise. It is understood by all that you are commander in chief of the United States and are sworn to protect our beloved country; this we understand, completely. However, as my mother used to say, quoting a Bible with which I often fought, "hate the sin, but love the sinner." There must be no more crushing of whole communities, no more torture, no more dehumanizing as a means of ruling a people's spirit. This has already happened to people of color, poor people, women, children. We see where this leads, where it has led.

A good model of how to "work with the enemy" internally is presented by the Dalai Lama, in his endless caretaking of his soul as he confronts the Chinese government that invaded Tibet. Because, finally, it is the soul that must be preserved, if one is to remain a credible leader. All else might be lost; but when the soul dies, the connection to earth, to peoples, to animals, to rivers, to mountain ranges, purple and majestic, also dies. And your smile, with which we watch you do gracious battle with unjust characterizations, distortions and lies, is that expression of healthy self-worth, spirit and soul, that, kept happy and free and relaxed, can find an answering smile in all of us, lighting our way, and brightening the world.

We are the ones we have been waiting for.

In Peace and Joy,
Alice Walker

Registration day

I just filled out our paperwork for LIFE is Good. I'm so excited!

The Early Bird deal ends in a month! Get on it, y'all!

Stalling

I'm supposed to be doing EVERYTHING today, but I haven't started yet. Instead, I've been having a lovely morning and lunch with Frank and MJ. I read for a while (I'm working through all my Jennifer Crusie novels again), then settled in for a nice visit with MJ while Frank worked on the computer. We talked about her writing (which recently has involved researching and incidentally memorizing some Romantic poetry), missing Chloe (who is still in Corvallis and may have to be kicked out by the Golds before she'll come home again), education, socializing in schools (evidently there is more of it at our local high school than I thought, but maybe not for the reason I might hope to attribute to it (good sense on the part of the educational establishment)), and the funny Megan story on Denise's blog which MJ had missed and which led into reminiscing about the
funny Chris story on Denise's blog. Through much of this, MJ gave me a backscratch, earning the much coveted and passed around title of Favorite Daughter.

Frank went to Ray's Drive-in (one of those old-fashioned places where they don't cook your food until you ask for it) and got us burgers and real-ice-cream milkshakes. We ate in the so-called marital bed, the three of us sitting side by side up against the headboard. It wasn't the kindest thing we could do to our sheets, now a bit grease- and ketchup-stained, but it was cozy.

And now I'm blogging. None of these activities was included in my previous definition of "EVERYTHING" so I've expanded my definition.

Life is good.

Friday fill-in

1. My blueprint for success includes happy kids. Is that too simplistic? How about this: kids who know how to (and that they can) go after what they want, no matter what it is.

2. A snack-size box of Milk Duds was the last candy I ate. There's a lot of leftover Halloween candy around this place (work), so my answer might be different if you ask me again an hour from now.

3. The best facial moisturizer I've ever used is an exfoliant. (Doesn't really moisturize, but it's helped my skin more than moisturizing.)

4. Blogging, talking with friends, and The Work can be good therapy.

5. I'd like to tell you about my talks at Live and Learn.

6. Optimism is my strongest characteristic. It's behind most everything else, including my tendency to procrastinate, and only my fear that things will go wrong comes close to measuring up. (Classic Gemini duality there.)

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to reading, tomorrow my plans include EVERYTHING, and Sunday, I want to cheer for the Hawks and do the (few, hardly worth mentioning) things I didn't get to on Saturday!

Have you?

From Frank from Sandy Feet from From Skilled Hands (and that's as far as I traced it)

Bold the things you’ve done. And I've italicized the things I've kind of done.

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain - little ones
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo - maybe in elementary school, I don't remember
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch - see #36
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train - Well, I slept overnight on a train. Is that the same thing?
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort - No, but I helped Judy build a snow penis once.
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors - Do you know how many countries I'd have to visit?!
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language - I have learned a new language. How does one teach oneself anything?
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain - Hard to avoid here.
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class - Well, I've dropped out of one anyway.
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies - Except I was a Bluebird.
62. Gone whale watching - incidentally while taking the ferry in BC last summer
63. Gotten flowers for no reason - but there's really always a reason!
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

And...I VOTED FOR OBAMA!!!

A prediction (essentially) comes true

"There's no question that in the next 30 or 40 years,
a Negro can also achieve the same position that my brother has..."

— Robert F. Kennedy, May 1961

Gratitude

Sandra has been doing a weekly Wednesday gratitude post. Today, I am inspired to join her.

Today, I am grateful for:

1. Approximately 63,893,037 votes.


2. Young people like MJ who give their money and time to support the ideals they believe in, even though this country doesn't recognize them as capable of contributing.

3. Like-minded friends and relatives who host fun parties and inspire Frank to make crab dip and shrimp étouffée.

4. The Internet.

5. Hope.

Split personality

Can you guess what part of the state we live in?

Dreams made real

"All right! There you go! America, I love you! I'm proud of you!"
— Annie Kinsella in "Field of Dreams"

"My lady... It is is a new day."
"It is a new world."
— Nurse and Viola in "Shakespeare in Love"

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day
live in a nation where they will not be
judged by the color of their skin
but by the content of their character."
— Martin Luther King, Jr.

"Let there be no reason for any American to fail to
cherish their citizenship in this, the greatest nation on Earth"
— Senator John McCain

"All things are possible."
— Barack Obama, President-elect of the United States of America

I don't know if I can put into words what Barack Obama's election means to me. It represents so much more than who will sit in the Oval Office for the next four years. Instead, it's about my daughters' futures, my hopes for this country, my hopes for the world, and the America that I want to love both in image and in reality.

For the first time in eight long, painful years, I am proud of this country and excited to see what will happen next. The American flag is my flag again, and the White House will soon once again be a symbol of cooperation and equality.

We spent tonight over at cousin Sonya's watching the election coverage with an multinational, multiracial, multiaged group, all of whom came together with the same enthusiasm and hope for the outcome of the election and what it would mean for America's direction over the next four years.

Some favorite moments:

• When Ohio went to Obama. That's when I started to believe.
• All the networks projecting Obama as the winner at 8:00:01 p.m. Pacific Time, even though not a single vote had been counted on the West coast. This was exciting, but it made me very nervous. Remember "Dewey beats Truman"?
• McCain's beautiful concession speech. (Where was this McCain through the election?)
• Footage from across America of people of all colors moved to joyful tears by Obama's election.
• The gravity on Obama's face as he gave his victory speech. It was not the expression of an arrogant or overconfident man. He knows exactly what he's gotten himself into, he takes it very seriously, and he will not act rashly. And did you notice that the hug Michelle gave him seemed one of comfort more than celebration? These are not stupid people; they know how difficult the next four years are going to be. I think that's a very good sign.

Good night, everybody. See you in the new world.

The Doings Report

I haven't done one of these in a long time, mostly because I've been focused on getting some Europe memories into the blog. That and recovering from jet lag, which it doesn't seem like I've quite managed even now. I'm still really tired, not sleeping well, irritable.

On the bright side, we're back in our routine, mostly caught up with the vacation backlog and kinda started on the holiday prep. The house is a disaster area, which gets to Frank and me but disturbs the girls not a bit. What we need is to invite some dinner guests over; that would motivate us to get things shipshape again.

MJ and Chloe have been computer-oriented since our return. MJ is reading and reading and reading, blogging again (yay!), and doing other writing but won't tell me what. Chloe is doing a little bit of a lot of things: writing for NaNoWriMo, watching anime, hanging out on MySpace, doing e-art (see her blog for a sample), reading, buying people, etc. Oh, and she's been putting in sessions cleaning her room.

Frank has also been blogging, keeping on top of the dishes (those that are not lost in the bowels of the house), and keeping us fed. He's put in some time getting materials ready for the Maier Family Cookbook that cousins Sonya and Becky are putting together, in anticipation of the big reunion next summer.

As for me, I've been working. A lot but not too much. In my off time, I hang out with the fambly and read and blog and wish there were more hours in the day and more gumption in my soul.

This past weekend, we went down to Corvallis for Non-Con and had a lovely time. We really missed the Traaseths and the Mayers (who were all there last year), but we had the Winklers and Buchholzes and more of the Hessels than last year to fill in the gaps. Fun people, fun times. The kids did lots of trick-or-treating on Friday, first in downtown Corvallis (the streets of which were packed with people) and then in Zenmomma's easy-to-hit-a-lot-of-houses-in-a-short-time neighborhood. MJ, Chloe, and Qacei were Spike the vampire (from "Buffy") and two of his babes. MJ pulled off the male look so well that some enlightened souls called her a fag when she was out walking later with Conor (who made a very convincing Hunter S. Thompson). If they had seen her in Qacei's lady-vampire outfit a little later, there would have been no way they'd make that mistake.

Saturday, we played music. Frank and Carolyn brought their guitars, and Bret, his bass, and they had a grand time fiddling out tunes with like-minded people. I accompanied them on Jon's drum, and it was good listening practice for me. I need practice.

My favorite song of the night was Hey Sarah Palin. "Oh, if you become VP, it's Canada for me." I hadn't heard it before and found it quite entertaining. (warning: just a bit of explicit language)

Sunday was our traditional closeout breakfast at Sunnyside Up. It was pretty hectic because it was homecoming weekend for the Beavers, but we cleared a few tables to help out and had a nice visit. We left Chloe behind for a few days' apprenticeship as a barrista, then made our way back home, listening to the Seahawks tank.

Now, I'm procrastinating a trip to work. I'd rather crawl back in bed and sleep for a few days.