Friday, November 30, 2007
Friday fill-in
2. I saw the most amazing RV this morning! It was down from Canada, and its dinghy (the around-town car towed behind) was completely covered by an impressive quantity of mud.
3. Indiana Jones 4 is the new movie I'm most looking forward to seeing.
4. Work: Necessary and intermittently enjoyable.
5. Of all the new tv shows, I enjoy Heroes the most. Are you on the list? (An exquisitely revitalized House is a very close second.)
6. If only Gore had been our president these past years. What a different world it might be!
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to driving a racecar simulator and finishing the new Nora Roberts novel, tomorrow my plans include some frantic catchup and lots of quiet reconnection with my family, and Sunday, I want to relax, watch the Seahawks win, and see some fabulous Christmas lights at Randi's!
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Put to the test
Did I mention I've been writing a Software Development Kit these past few weeks, a technical document full of terminology that might as well be Greek for all it means to me?
But I'm not sure where my mom came into the picture. :-)
Thursday 13
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1. Quit my job. I don't understand lottery winners who don't. "Oh, we're going to keep everything just the same." Let me just say: No. Way. Dude. The very best thing a lottery would buy me is TIME. 2. Find a financial advisor to help me protect my principal. 3. Spend more time with my kids. I'd like them to have a chance to be with me as much as they want, on their own schedule. 4. Hire a housekeeper—or better yet, a personal assistant who does windows. 5. Get organized. 6. Set up trust funds for my kids and probably several extra kids. 7. Make a housing change. The extent of this change would depend on the size of the lottery. At the low end, I'd buy a nearby house or condo for my kids because they're ready for more independence (and they'd still have bedrooms at home). At the high end, let's just say we'd increase our holdings. 8. Give big chunks of money to the Nature Conservancy, the ACLU, Habitat for Humanity, Move On, Greenpeace, the Cousteau Society, the Smithsonian, etc. 9. Buy some toys. Frank wants cars. I'd just like a moderate shopping spree every now and then. 10. Pursue some dreams. We do this already, of course, but money would make it easier. Frank would like another shot at cruising. I would like to make a home for more kids, and I have about six neglected books under way. Chloe and MJ would find it easier to dream bigger. 11. Eat out more. I'd like more nice or quirky restaurants in my life. 12. Get instant gratification more often. Waiting and juggling and picking between gets old. 13. Travel, travel, travel, travel, travel. |
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Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Arguing with atheists
How Not to Embarrass Yourself in an Argument With an Atheist
He links to How Not to Convert an Atheist, which was not written by a Christian but which also contains some good points.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Picture Life
Here we go!
1. Age At Next Birthday: 43
2. Place I'd Like To Travel: Eutopia
3. Favorite Place: Lost in a good book
4. Favorite Objects: Hugs
5. Favorite Foods:
Pesto

Swedish Fish

My mom's fried chicken
My grandma's snickerdoodles

6. Favorite Animal: All my children
7. Favorite Color: Royal blue
8. My Nicknames:
Miss V
Mouth (when I was a very young, even more talkative child. Don't use it if you expect me to answer nowadays!)
9. Town I Was Born In: Ellensburg
10. Bad Habit I Have: Biting my nails
Tag! You're it!
Monday, November 26, 2007
A crisis of optimism
"It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: 'And this, too, shall pass away.' How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!"
— Abraham Lincoln
Click to read more cool tidbits about This too shall pass.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Thursday Thirteen
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The obvious 1. Planetary conditions conducive to the full life they've been given to expect 2. World peace 3. Health, vitality, and long life 4. Relationships full of love and acceptance 5. Children of their own (okay, so this one is a bit selfish) 6. Fulfillment The rest 7. Adventures (however they define that) 8. A continuing sense of wonder and discovery 9. A life defined 10. Abundance both perceived and actual 11. Community 12. All the animals they can support (no allergies!) 13. Laughter every day |
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Wednesday, November 21, 2007
A word game
This evening, Chloe and I used the Quiddler cards to play our own game. We used all the cards in the (large) deck to make a bunch of random words. Well, we used almost all the cards: we had one Q left over. Next, we tried to use all of the words in a bit of creative writing. I am not allowed to share Chloe's, but here's what I came up with. The required words are boldface.
A wiser Jack did dig that day
His one-quid tax resigned to pay,
"Hey, you there, Pearl!" he called with fear,
"Evil Nott has bid me quiz your lair!
"With thunder clap and roar of jet,
"His Key of Truth I must now get."
So while Heaven watched and Evil waited,
With Ruin, her gay air a-bated,
Jack the 'Niner, with ladle and drum,
Against the cliffs applied weary thumb,
Til in Zone of Six he found his cure—
The hope of hopes for one less pure—
And mounted his toboggan and left his woes
To pass beyond the status quo.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Friday, November 16, 2007
Friday fill-in
2. My Thanksgiving traditions include a round-robin of gratitude, pasta with our turkey, champagne, and time spent playing charades and board games.
3. The best part about Thanksgiving is the traditions.
4. My favorite Thanksgiving food is pie.
5. There's never been anything that was the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to me on Thanksgiving.
6. After the meal, I will have some more champagne and do something idiotic as a charade (but I won't be embarrassed).
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to being with my family, tomorrow my plans include doing the laundry and Sunday, I want to see the Seahawks beat the Bears!
All hail the FSM
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21837499/?gt1=10547
"Indeed, the tale of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and its followers cuts to the heart of the one of the thorniest questions in religious studies: What defines a religion? Does it require a genuine theological belief? Or simply a set of rituals and a community joining together as a way of signaling their cultural alliances to others?
"In short, is an anti-religion like Flying Spaghetti Monsterism actually a religion?"
Indeed.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Disappearing water
World Water Crisis
US Drought Monitor
America's Drought
The Incredible Shrinking Colorado River
Southwest Sizzle
Atlanta Dries Up
Australia's Desperate Rain Dance
Water Shortages in Africa
Greece Struggles
10 Million Face China Water Shortage
India's Water Worries
Vanishing Himalayan Glaciers
Water Conflict in the Middle East
Thoughts from Dave Pollard
Thoughts from Ted Turner
Even Big Business agrees...
Get the picture?
Thursday 13
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1. 13 places I want to visit. 2. 13 reasons to vote for a Democrat in 2008. 3. 13 things I would do if I won the lottery. 4. 13 best foods to eat in New Orleans. 5. 13 more places I want to visit. 6. 13 things I would do if I knew I could not fail. 7. 13 ways I would have filled my time if I'd been unschooled. 8. 13 things I wish I hadn't bought. 9. 13 things I don't regret buying but wish I could get rid of now. 10. 13 places I want to visit again. 11. 13 things I proselytize about (update to this). 12. 13 reasons to unschool. 13. 13 hopes for my daughters' futures. |
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Wednesday, November 14, 2007
My baby!
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Hugs to Eric and family
Pretty in pink

And here is my dad, acting as their very attractive cheerleader. The woman with him is their friend Cindy, a survivor.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Borrowed photos
Okay, so I'm easily flattered. :-)
Ten pet peeves
So maybe I'll skip the rant and just list some pet peeves. This is by no means a comprehensive list.
1. When mothers threaten their children, especially in malls and other public places. Most recently overheard threat: "Stop doing that or you won't get your cookie." gack
2. When the scissors have not been returned to their drawer in the kitchen. We probably own eight pairs of scissors, yet I can never lay hands on one.
3. When people don't show up for meetings at work.
4. When people on message boards get pissed off over the advice they receive instead of simply ignoring what they don't like (or better yet, thinking about what was said).
5. When people hog the left lane. I know I might have mentioned that one before (like a dozen times), but it bears repeating.
6. When people say "so-and-so and I" when they should say "so-and-so and me." The trick: If you would use "me" if there were no so-and-so, then you should use "me." For example, "She went to the store with so-and-so and me" and "Send the e-mail to so-and-so and me" are both correct.
7. Same as above but substitute "myself" for the "I".
8. When I make grammar and spelling mistakes, especially mistakes that get published. (Did you know I have been known to flush with shame over and hurry to edit two-year-old blog posts?)
9. When Wendy's (and it always seems to be Wendy's) gives us the wrong food. "They f*** you at the drive-through!"
10. When I set out to make a list of ten items and can only come up with nine.
A new Favorite for you
http://www.awesomerandomosity.blogspot.com/
I've added a link to this and many other Favorites in the updated sidebar at right. And in other blog news, I've added a new label: non-con. Now LIFE is Good and Non-Con posts are separately grouped. Grouped separately? You know what I mean.
Friday, November 9, 2007
February whispers
Remember, dear readers, you heard it here first, off the record, on the Q.T., and very hush-hush.
Friday fill-in
2. I'm happy when things are. (period)
3. The last thing I drank was Coke.
4. One of the most valuable things in my life is our friendships with other unschoolers.
5. I like mushrooms, black olives, and lots of cheese on my pizza.
6. Dear November, don't go by too fast.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to sleeping ('cause I've had a couple of short nights in a row), tomorrow my plans include a STUN movie party, and Sunday, I want to smile as much as I did last Sunday! (was "see the Seahawks win..." but I just found out that the Hawks play Monday instead)
A taste of MySpace
A
• Are you available?: indeed [for what?]
• What is your age?: fifteen [the answer to life, the universe, and everything]
• What annoys you?: stupid people. mean people. bad grammar. [GW Bush - a stupid, mean person who uses bad grammar]
B
• Do you know anyone named Billy?: i do. [I know some Bills (my dad for one!), and a woman named Billie. No Billy that I can think of.]
• When is your birthday?: september [May]
• Who is your best friend(s)? chloe [4-way tie: Steph. Frank. MJ. Chloe.]
C
• What's your favorite candy? what a difficult question. [Duds]
• Crush? exists and seems like it will for awhile [yep, for more than 20 years now]
• When was the last time you cried?: hmmm, when i finished a very sad book the other day called extremely loud and incredibly close by jonathan safran foer [two nights ago]
D
• Do you daydream?: all the time. favorite pastime. [Not really. I think a lot.]
• What's your favorite kind of dog?: great danes and irish wolfhounds [belonging to other people]
• What day of the week is it? mondayyy (MJ answered this Oct. 29th, I think) [Friday, baby!]
E
• How do you like your eggs?: over medium and made by my father or scrambled and made by my sister. [in a cheese-and-mushroom omelette]
• Have you ever been in the emergency room?: i have. [a number of times, but never as exciting as MJ's trip]
F
• Do you use fly swatters?: i avoid flies at all costs. [rolled-up newspaper usually]
• Have you ever used a foghorn? sadly, no. [no]
• Is there a fan in your room?: no, i live in the northwest, it's too cold for fans. [yes, 'cause even in the northwest the upstairs gets hot in the summer -- and no A/C]
G
• Do you chew gum?: for sure. [occasionally]
• Do you like gummy candies?: yep, but not constantly. my dad buys them all the time and i get sick of them. [occasionally]
• Do you like gory movies?: oh yes, so very much. [occasionally]
H
• How are you?: groggy, kinda unhappy, missing people [sleepy but good]
• What's your height?: 5'3" [5'6"]
• What color is your hair? dark brown [salt-and-brown]
I
• Have you ever ice skated?: i'm horrible at it. [yes, very carefully]
• What's your favorite kind of ice cream?: chocolate chip cookie dough [rocky road]
J
• Have you ever heard a really hilarious joke? indeed. ["...major combat operations in Iraq have ended."]
• Do you wear jewelry?: two rings, a bracelet or four, a necklace, three earrings in each ear and a nose ring. [one pair of earrings and my wedding ring always, other stuff from time to time]
K
• Do you think kangaroos are cute?: absolutely. [absolutely]
L
• Love at first sight? maybe. [self-fulfilling prophecy maybe?]
• Lions or tigers?: bears, oh my. [tigers]
• Do you like black licorice?: kinda. [yes]
M
• Favorite movie as a kid?: beauty and the beast. [West Side Story]
• Ever shopped at Moosejaw?: never heard of it. and i wouldn't shop there cuz it has a ridiculous name. [no, but I would even with the ridiculous name]
• Favorite store at the mall? i like scorning hot topic, then shopping there anyway. [Cinnabon]
N
• Do you have a nickname? MJ, Mary Jane, Idgy, Marjie. [now? dragonfly, Miss V. from my youth? I don't wanna talk about it.]
• What's your favorite number? 15 [22]
• Do you prefer night or day?: nighttime. [both, but night wins by a nose]
O
• What's your one wish? it's a secret. if you ask i might tell. [that the Republican scientists are right (but I think we are all doomed to disappointment on that score)]
• Are you an only child?: siblings, i have. [no, I have siblings of many varieties]
• Do you like the color orange?: sure, why not? [some shades more than others, but yeah]
P
• What are you most paranoid about?: alien invasion. [nothing]
• Piercings?: 7 [2]
• Do you know anyone named Penelope?: i do not. [only in fiction]
Q
• Are you quick to judge people?: i get a first impression, then learn about them, then judge. not in a bad way or anything, god. [not too much except for certain "triggers"]
• Do you like Quaker Oats?: i like sugar with quaker oats. [occasionally]
• Quilts?: yes please. [often]
R
• Do you think you're always right?: it's a bad habit of mine. [about half the time]
• Do you watch reality tv? not on your life. [only by accident]
• Reason to cry?: sad stories. [what have you got?]
S
• Do you prefer Sun or Rain? both [sun]
• Do you like snow?: adoration [in moderation]
• What's your favorite season?: summer, winter, fall, spring. [late spring, early fall -- summer weather without the crowds]
T
• What time is it?: 11:55 [4:43 p.m.]
• What time did you wake up? nine? eight? ten? dunno. [half an hour too late]
• Any Tattoos?: not yet. [not yet]
U
• Can you ride a unicycle?: hahahahahahahahahahahahahaHA. [I don't know]
• Umbrellas?: once in a blue moon. [usually not]
V
• What's the worst vegetable?: asparagus. [canned peas]
• Did you ever watch Veggie Tales?: hell no. that's religious shit. i do like the pirates who don't do anything song, tho. [I might have heard of it once before this.]
• Ever considered being vegetarian? i am and have been for over a year. [not for long]
W
• Do you like water rides?: yeaaaa booooyyyyyeeeeeee. [on a hot day, oh yeah]
X
• Have you ever had an x-ray?: yes. [hmm, don't think so]
• Ever used a Xerox machine? i live for xerox. [maybe not an actual Xerox, not sure]
Y
• Do you like the color yellow?: adoration. [very much]
• What year were you born in?: 1992 ['65]
• Do you yell when you're angry? i curse a blue streak and yell myself hoarse. i don't have good temper control once i lose it. [it's been known to happen]
Z
• What's your zodiac sign?: virgo [Gemini, of course]
• When was the last time you went to the zoo? forever ago. i like the zoo, except for the fact that animals should be in the wild. [February 2007 in San Diego]
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Non-Con revisited
Zenmomma's Garden (Mary)
Our Joyful Life (Kelli)
The Wonderful Happens (Gillian and Craig)
Bodhicitta (Diana)
Want more unschooling blogs? Here are some other of my faves:
Normal is SO last week (Qacei)
Learning in Freedom (Ren)
Another Roadside Attraction (Rue)
- author of the amazing Parenting a Free Child
This Is How We Shine (Anne)
Warts and All (Schuyler)
Sandra Dodd (family-life blog)
Oh, there are too many good ones. Many of those have Live and Learn, LIFE is Good, or Unschooling blog ring links that you can click to see even more.
Thursday 13
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1. Sorting the mail |
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Wednesday, November 7, 2007
The only bright side...
Girl, 13, gets detention for hugging two friends
I'm just not sure what this experience is supposed to teach her.
And when I contrast it with our joyous weekend—where we had kids of all ages hugging, holding hands, walking arm in arm, wrestling, tumbling, tickling, and laughing, laughing, laughing—I just want to cry.
Socialization? I prefer our variety, thank you.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Acceptance
i have no air
no space to breathe
everything i do is wrong
everything i say is rude
every way i look is bad
what the fuck people
i can't please anybody
i'm not happy with myself
so why should you be
but for god's sake
you don't really have to tell me every
single
time
i fuck up
— Anonymous. Used by permission.
I've added a new label to the blog: acceptance.
The poem above was written by a teen friend. It made me realize that acceptance is the unschooling concept I would most like to promote. It is, after all, the concept that has made the biggest difference in our family, from repairing my damaged relationship with MJ (who had to live through more of my newparentitis and horrible mistakes), to building our new family dynamic, to opening up the world—with a nice side benefit of improving my self-esteem.
Our society is geared toward correction. If someone was wrong yesterday, we tell them. If someone is wrong today, we tell them. If someone might be wrong someday, we tell them. When it comes to kids, this inclination toward correction is magnified a thousandfold. From "Say please" to "Chew with your mouth closed" to "Stand up straight" to "Are you going out like that?" to "Have you given any thought to your future?", we bombard kids with messages that they will only be accepted when they change. So they do. And then they're confronted with the next set of expectations. So they change again.
For most of us, a day comes when we realize "they" will never be satisfied, so we'd just better get on with accepting ourselves.
Well, here's a question for you: If you have to tell a kid something, why not tell them that? Why not let them skip all those pointless years of struggle? Let them skip the part where they fight that voracious monster, Expectation.
Just let them be.
Accept.
One small example: Those of you who knew Chloe when she was younger might remember her headful of superfine blonde snarls. Matted rats. (And if you didn't know Chloe then, check out Fergus and multiply snarls by three. Or maybe six.) There were a couple of times when she and I decided cutting it off was our best option (easier than, if not as rewarding as, brushing it out). I had moments of hair-despair, and my mother probably wanted to call CPS on me. But I let Chloe be. And this is Chloe now.
We still don't tell her to brush her hair. But now it's beautiful, and people compliment her, and she likes it. She remembers being that messy-headed kid, though. At Non-Con this weekend, I overheard a little conversation between Chloe and Fergus:
Chloe: I like your hair.
Fergus: It's unusual, but I like it.
That's acceptance, folks.
...
Look at this!
History of Photography (photographic, of course!)
Deadliest Year (despite recent "things are improving" reports)
Fruits Basket (Chloe's favorite manga/anime)
Tattoo Magazine (one of MJ's subscriptions)
Decisive Battles of the Civil War (interactive)
Luke and Laura's Reunion (a BIG General Hospital moment from Ronnie's college days)
Ten Places of a Lifetime (I've been to 5 of them so far)
Free Hugs ('cause you can't watch it enough)
Ronnie looks like... (try it with your name!)
Monday, November 5, 2007
Non-Con '07
Here are just a few—okay, more than a dozen—of the 155 photos we took.
Our man Fergus, enjoying hot cocoa and whipped cream—in separate cups, thank you—at the Sunnyside Up Café.
Dragonfly and Zenmomma
Blurry but beautiful Girl Circle
- front row: Kyra, Effie, Steffi
- back row: Chloe, MJ, Qacei, Abbi
An Amy Steinberg concert just for us
Watching Amy
- at the bar: Chloe, MJ, Scotty, Diana, Abbi, a friend of Amy's, Kelli
- at the front table: Effie, Steffi, Kyra, Qacei, Mary
- others: Craig (sitting on the floor with not-shown Fergus and Marty), Michael (another friend of Amy's whom we adopted), Mercedes with Jon behind her, Donna, Hayden at the Community Table with Conor), and of course Frank
Merchandise moxie
Chloe and Qacei
Bad Marty! Just kidding—he's counting for yet another game of hide-and-seek with Fergus and the gang.
Daughter and Dad
MJ and Chloe doing Yankee Doodle while Conor looks on
Rafael shows Fergus her new 'stache
Hola!
- from left: Kyra, Qacei, Hayden, Mercedes, Diana, MJ, Chloe, Ducky, Mads
Qacei and Chloe
Kyra, Qacei, and Chloe walking (?) down Monroe Street
The unschoolers invade the Fair Trade store
Stepping out of the box
"For the first time, in what seems like my entire life, I am not terrified...
"My husband and I were talking about being put into the proverbial box (i.e. the 'school' box or the 'good little child' box or even the ‘good parent’ box) and he made an analogy that was quite startling to me. He said, 'It’s as if people start lopping off pieces of the child, in order, to fit them inside that very tiny box.' I had a disturbing image of pieces of myself lying outside my own box. I have been in that box since a very early age and only the label on the outside has changed. I was the Good Girl, the Good Student, and the Good Parent among other things. He asked, 'What if the best parts of us are lying outside that box?'
"I didn't even realize I was confined because I was put in there very early in my life. Even though the lid has been off for quite sometime now, I didn't know to get out. It makes me very sad to think that my fear has pushed me to confine my children the way I’ve been confined. I think of the pain caused by ‘lopping’ off parts of who they are just to fit some kind of ‘ideal’ that [is] not even beneficial to them and I’m so remorseful.
"So as of today, I am stepping out of my box..."
By jbantau
Gratitude Dance
- F, M, & C (as always)
- Good friends (especially Steph (as always), Mary, and Gillian)
- Laughter and joy by the truckload
- Anne's normal BP and EKG that was only "a teeny weeny bit irregular"
- Jambalaya
- Keeping our Sunnyside Up
- Unschooling (as always)
Sunday, November 4, 2007
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Auction success
Cool stuff:
MJ was in charge of one group of volunteers. She handed out assignments and provided information and instructions.
Warren Moon and his (new) wife are pretty involved with HFH, so they were there. In addition to all of the above duties, MJ and Frank spent some time with the Moons' ~1yo son. He is evidently quite the cutie, and he found Frank's beard fascinating.
No word yet on total donations, but it sounds like it went well.
If you'd like to contribute to the cause—and having seen several of the horses that they've helped this past year, I can tell you it is a very worth one—you can use PayPal, or you can mail a check to:
Hope for Horses
PO Box 1790
Woodinville, WA 98072
Friday, November 2, 2007
Photo recap
MJ's Birthday at IHOP





Maddie's Birthday




Halloween




















