Friday, July 24, 2009
Mindful learning
I mentioned a few days ago that I am reading Ellen J. Langer's book "The Power of Mindful Learning." It is proving to be a fascinating read, despite some muddy writing in places. The book contains a lot of information about numerous studies that show how learning really works, and I strongly recommend that you read it yourself if you're so inclined.
Here, I'm going to pull out a few excerpts that really resonated with me, and that support her contention that some of the deepest rooted beliefs in education are myths.
Myth #1: The basics must be learned so well that they become second nature.
"The standard two approaches to teaching new skills are top-down or bottom-up... I sought a third alternative...
"Sideways learning aims at maintaining a mindful state. As we saw, the concept of mindfulness revolves around certain psychological states that are really different versions of the same thing: (1) openness to novelty; (2) alertness to distinction; (3) sensitivity to different contexts; (4) implicit, if not explicit, awareness of multiple perspectives; and (5) orientation in the present... Learning a subject or skill with [sideways learning] makes us receptive to changes in an ongoing situation. In such a state of mind, basic skills and information guide our behavior in the present, rather than run it like a computer program."
Myth #2: Paying attention means staying focused on one thing at a time.
"...when children or adults are distracted they are paying attention to something else... Being distracted, in short, means being otherwise attracted." (emphasis mine)
She discusses how studies have shown that attention is really more effective when we or what we are focusing on is changing, shifting, moving, and that the whole concept of attention as something that should be fixed or static or focused is faulty. Then she has this to say about ADHD:
"Mary Ford found that attention increased when third and fourth graders diagnosed as having ADHD were working with computer softare that used a game format. Frances Cripe found that children with ADHD demonstrated decreased activity and increased attention when listening to rock music as they performed their task. And Sydney Zentall found that when the stimuli were in color, attention increased.
"Some of the problems associated with treating ADHD and other attention problems may result from a lack of appreciation for the importance of novelty. Hyperactivity may be the child's implicit effort to increase novelty. If so, the advice to sit still and pay attention may be counterproductive." (emphasis mine)
Myth #3: Delaying gratification is important.
"If we don't open the presents until Christmas, or if we plan a trip for after the new year, aren't we delaying gratification? We are not, if the anticipation itself is positive... it is merely being gratified by anticipation as well as by the actual [event]."
"There are two approaches that educators and parents typically use to encourage children to engage in a disliked activity... They promise children that rewards (or punishments for noncompliance) will follow, or they add fun elements to the unpleasant task. In both cases they reinforce children's presumptions that the task is odious."
Myth #4: Rote memorization is necessary in education.
"Education traditionally has given students packages of information that are largely context free. Even when context is provided, the manner in which the information is presented still encourages mindless processing. Saying, for instance, that there were three reasons for the Civil War omits both context and perspective. What did a fifty-year-old Southern white man think the reasons were? A fifty-year-old black? A young Northern woman? And so on... Even if information is given from two perspectives, if the possibility of additional views is not intentionally built in, the tendency of students is to consider these two just as rigidly; there would simply be twice as much absolute information to memorize."
"[In a recent study] students who learned the material in the traditional manner and were told of an impending test performed worse than all other groups...
"...we found that the students who did not rely on memorization outperformed the others on every measure..." (emphasis mine)
Myth #5: Forgetting is a problem.
This section covers a lot of ground.
"Perhaps when we can't find our keys it is because we were thinking about more important matters when we put them down. If that were not the case, why would we forgive the geniuses among us for their absentmindedness... Geniuses or not, once we recognize that we have forgotten something we need, we become oriented to the present and reinvent or rediscover what we need to know. In this sense, forgetting provokes mindfulness. Memorizing keeps us in the past; forgetting forces us into the present." (emphasis mine)
"The prepared group [group that had been shown examples] came up with two solutions; the unprepared group came up with ten."
"These results support the view that cultural beliefs about aging play a role in determining the degree of memory loss that people experience in old age."
Myth #6: Intelligence is knowing "what's out there."
"Many theories of intelligence assume that there is an absolute reality out there, and the more intelligent the person, the greater his or her awareness of this reality... An alternative view, which is at the base of mindfulness research, is that individuals may always define their relation to their environment in several ways, essentially creating the reality that is out there." (emphasis mine)
Myth #7: There are right and wrong answers.
"Much instruction...[r]ather than allowing an individual to generate new hypotheses that may be mindfully tested... assumes that the objective is apparent and that only the means of achieving it remains obscure to the naive observer. Teaching from this perspective consists of presenting step-by-step methods of problem solving, making possible an essentially mindless type of success.
"If we can shed this outcome orientation, we may discover that the freedom to define the process is more significant..."
"Intelligence testing, which focused first on such skills as bisecting lines or judging weights and later stressed problem solving, now emphasizes the ability to acquire new skills. In each case the objective—physical motion, problem resolution, or skill acquisition—is preselected by the intelligence expert.
"When students are assessed in this way, they are not given an opportunity to choose their own objectives, nor are they allowed to explore processes that are outside the experts' repertoire of valued skills."
"...the ability to maintain stable categories is often critical for the expert's authority."
"Although social scientists recognize that applying statistical data derived from groups to individual cases is problematic, this recognition does not appear to restrict attempts to [do so]."
"For some... [uncertainty] represents an absence of personal control. From a mindful perspective, however, uncertainty creates the freedom to discover meaning. If there are meaningful choices, there is uncertainty. If there is no choice, there is no uncertainty and no opportunity for control. The theory of mindfulness insists that uncertainty and the experience of personal control are inseparable." (emphasis mine)
"When we are mindful, we recognize that every inadequate answer is adequate in another context... If we respect students' abilities to define their own experiences, to generate their own hypotheses, and to discover new ways of categorizing the world, we might not be so quick to evaluate the adequacy of their answers. We might, instead, begin listening to their questions. Out of the questions of students come some of the most creative ideas and discoveries." (emphasis mine)
Here, I'm going to pull out a few excerpts that really resonated with me, and that support her contention that some of the deepest rooted beliefs in education are myths.
Myth #1: The basics must be learned so well that they become second nature.
"The standard two approaches to teaching new skills are top-down or bottom-up... I sought a third alternative...
"Sideways learning aims at maintaining a mindful state. As we saw, the concept of mindfulness revolves around certain psychological states that are really different versions of the same thing: (1) openness to novelty; (2) alertness to distinction; (3) sensitivity to different contexts; (4) implicit, if not explicit, awareness of multiple perspectives; and (5) orientation in the present... Learning a subject or skill with [sideways learning] makes us receptive to changes in an ongoing situation. In such a state of mind, basic skills and information guide our behavior in the present, rather than run it like a computer program."
Myth #2: Paying attention means staying focused on one thing at a time.
"...when children or adults are distracted they are paying attention to something else... Being distracted, in short, means being otherwise attracted." (emphasis mine)
She discusses how studies have shown that attention is really more effective when we or what we are focusing on is changing, shifting, moving, and that the whole concept of attention as something that should be fixed or static or focused is faulty. Then she has this to say about ADHD:
"Mary Ford found that attention increased when third and fourth graders diagnosed as having ADHD were working with computer softare that used a game format. Frances Cripe found that children with ADHD demonstrated decreased activity and increased attention when listening to rock music as they performed their task. And Sydney Zentall found that when the stimuli were in color, attention increased.
"Some of the problems associated with treating ADHD and other attention problems may result from a lack of appreciation for the importance of novelty. Hyperactivity may be the child's implicit effort to increase novelty. If so, the advice to sit still and pay attention may be counterproductive." (emphasis mine)
Myth #3: Delaying gratification is important.
"If we don't open the presents until Christmas, or if we plan a trip for after the new year, aren't we delaying gratification? We are not, if the anticipation itself is positive... it is merely being gratified by anticipation as well as by the actual [event]."
"There are two approaches that educators and parents typically use to encourage children to engage in a disliked activity... They promise children that rewards (or punishments for noncompliance) will follow, or they add fun elements to the unpleasant task. In both cases they reinforce children's presumptions that the task is odious."
Myth #4: Rote memorization is necessary in education.
"Education traditionally has given students packages of information that are largely context free. Even when context is provided, the manner in which the information is presented still encourages mindless processing. Saying, for instance, that there were three reasons for the Civil War omits both context and perspective. What did a fifty-year-old Southern white man think the reasons were? A fifty-year-old black? A young Northern woman? And so on... Even if information is given from two perspectives, if the possibility of additional views is not intentionally built in, the tendency of students is to consider these two just as rigidly; there would simply be twice as much absolute information to memorize."
"[In a recent study] students who learned the material in the traditional manner and were told of an impending test performed worse than all other groups...
"...we found that the students who did not rely on memorization outperformed the others on every measure..." (emphasis mine)
Myth #5: Forgetting is a problem.
This section covers a lot of ground.
"Perhaps when we can't find our keys it is because we were thinking about more important matters when we put them down. If that were not the case, why would we forgive the geniuses among us for their absentmindedness... Geniuses or not, once we recognize that we have forgotten something we need, we become oriented to the present and reinvent or rediscover what we need to know. In this sense, forgetting provokes mindfulness. Memorizing keeps us in the past; forgetting forces us into the present." (emphasis mine)
"The prepared group [group that had been shown examples] came up with two solutions; the unprepared group came up with ten."
"These results support the view that cultural beliefs about aging play a role in determining the degree of memory loss that people experience in old age."
Myth #6: Intelligence is knowing "what's out there."
"Many theories of intelligence assume that there is an absolute reality out there, and the more intelligent the person, the greater his or her awareness of this reality... An alternative view, which is at the base of mindfulness research, is that individuals may always define their relation to their environment in several ways, essentially creating the reality that is out there." (emphasis mine)
Myth #7: There are right and wrong answers.
"Much instruction...[r]ather than allowing an individual to generate new hypotheses that may be mindfully tested... assumes that the objective is apparent and that only the means of achieving it remains obscure to the naive observer. Teaching from this perspective consists of presenting step-by-step methods of problem solving, making possible an essentially mindless type of success.
"If we can shed this outcome orientation, we may discover that the freedom to define the process is more significant..."
"Intelligence testing, which focused first on such skills as bisecting lines or judging weights and later stressed problem solving, now emphasizes the ability to acquire new skills. In each case the objective—physical motion, problem resolution, or skill acquisition—is preselected by the intelligence expert.
"When students are assessed in this way, they are not given an opportunity to choose their own objectives, nor are they allowed to explore processes that are outside the experts' repertoire of valued skills."
"...the ability to maintain stable categories is often critical for the expert's authority."
"Although social scientists recognize that applying statistical data derived from groups to individual cases is problematic, this recognition does not appear to restrict attempts to [do so]."
"For some... [uncertainty] represents an absence of personal control. From a mindful perspective, however, uncertainty creates the freedom to discover meaning. If there are meaningful choices, there is uncertainty. If there is no choice, there is no uncertainty and no opportunity for control. The theory of mindfulness insists that uncertainty and the experience of personal control are inseparable." (emphasis mine)
"When we are mindful, we recognize that every inadequate answer is adequate in another context... If we respect students' abilities to define their own experiences, to generate their own hypotheses, and to discover new ways of categorizing the world, we might not be so quick to evaluate the adequacy of their answers. We might, instead, begin listening to their questions. Out of the questions of students come some of the most creative ideas and discoveries." (emphasis mine)
Labels:
learning,
mindfulness
It's Learn Nothing Day! Again!
Another chance to try (and probably fail) to learn nothing for a day.
http://sandradodd.com/learnnothingday/
http://sandradodd.com/learnnothingday/
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
The roots of violence (and often despair)
This is an excerpt from today's Daily Groove, "The Roots of Violence."
Nothing is more natural than for a child to become angry when his intention is thwarted. Anger is a reaction to perceived entrapment or disempowerment; it activates the body's primal energies for restoring freedom and personal power. These energies can be applied violently... or creatively.
But when anger itself is thwarted -- when those energies are successfully suppressed via threats of punishment, withdrawal, or exclusion -- the child will descend into hopelessness... The child may then appear "well-adjusted," but those energies persist, like a sleeping volcano...
read the rest
Nothing is more natural than for a child to become angry when his intention is thwarted. Anger is a reaction to perceived entrapment or disempowerment; it activates the body's primal energies for restoring freedom and personal power. These energies can be applied violently... or creatively.
But when anger itself is thwarted -- when those energies are successfully suppressed via threats of punishment, withdrawal, or exclusion -- the child will descend into hopelessness... The child may then appear "well-adjusted," but those energies persist, like a sleeping volcano...
read the rest
Labels:
acceptance
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
In four years' time
It's my blogoversary! Four happy years in the blogosphere.
The post that started it all:
Shaping up the ship
(posts dated earlier than that are just in storage)
Posts that were especially fun to create:
What unschooling looked like today (2/14/07) - The first in a series. I was inspired, and it was a very fun day.
My thirteen favorite movies - Big project, loved every minute of it, was really pleased with my descriptions.
Thirteen memorable movie smiles - The concept captured me. I wanted it to be a Thursday 27.
Some of our favorite Firefly quotes - Group project, fun with my girls.
My Non-Con North writeup - I was riding a non-con high and loved sorting through the photos, wallowing in the memories.
Posts that were dragged out of me (aka "growth posts"):
On free time and frivolity
Control
My thirteen best and worst memories of childhood
Posts that have been selected for publication elsewhere, with my permission:
Unschooling Meme
Profiling
Unschooling FAQ
About intelligences and learning styles
Accepted (in part)
And two that were incorporated into (longer) conference talks:
On enjoying teenagers
Unschooling in difficult times
Post with the most comments:
Thirteen wonderful memories of LIFE is Good 2008
Post with the best (okay, only) celebrity comment:
Thirteen of my favorite romance novels
Post I wish I'd never written:
(no longer available)
And finally, the post I wish the whole world could see:
Acceptance
(for my friend's poem more than my words)
The post that started it all:
Shaping up the ship
(posts dated earlier than that are just in storage)
Posts that were especially fun to create:
What unschooling looked like today (2/14/07) - The first in a series. I was inspired, and it was a very fun day.
My thirteen favorite movies - Big project, loved every minute of it, was really pleased with my descriptions.
Thirteen memorable movie smiles - The concept captured me. I wanted it to be a Thursday 27.
Some of our favorite Firefly quotes - Group project, fun with my girls.
My Non-Con North writeup - I was riding a non-con high and loved sorting through the photos, wallowing in the memories.
Posts that were dragged out of me (aka "growth posts"):
On free time and frivolity
Control
My thirteen best and worst memories of childhood
Posts that have been selected for publication elsewhere, with my permission:
Unschooling Meme
Profiling
Unschooling FAQ
About intelligences and learning styles
Accepted (in part)
And two that were incorporated into (longer) conference talks:
On enjoying teenagers
Unschooling in difficult times
Post with the most comments:
Thirteen wonderful memories of LIFE is Good 2008
Post with the best (okay, only) celebrity comment:
Thirteen of my favorite romance novels
Post I wish I'd never written:
(no longer available)
And finally, the post I wish the whole world could see:
Acceptance
(for my friend's poem more than my words)
Labels:
blognews
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Hula hoop recipe
Yield: 8 to 10 hoops
Supplies:
- 100' of 3/4-inch flex poly tubing (used in sprinkler systems)
- 8 to 10 double-ended 3/4-inch nipple connectors
- Duct tape for closing hoops (optional)
- Multicolored electrical tape for weighting and decorating hoops
Tools:
- Something sharp that can cut cleanly through the tubing
- Hot water or a hair dryer to soften the tubing (or really strong hands)
To make a hoop:
Measure out and cut enough tubing to make a hoop that, when stood on edge, reaches somewhere between the hooper's bellybutton and chest. (For me, that's between 11 and 12 feet of tubing. Yes, these hoops are larger than toy-store hoops; that's what makes them so fun and easy to use.)
Insert connector and shove hoop edges tightly together. Wrap seam securely in duct or electrical tape. Decorate with electrical tape, being careful not to add so much tape that the hoop gets too heavy for your skills and energy level. (We have hoops with no decoration at all.)
To hula hoop:
Position the hoop at about waist level and give it a good spin. Move your hips slightly to keep the hoop in motion. It doesn't take a big motion, and you can choose to go front to back or side to side or sort of all around. Click here to view many demonstrations.
With MANY thanks to Dana the Coffee Goddess for instructions, tips, and hours of fun!
Supplies:
- 100' of 3/4-inch flex poly tubing (used in sprinkler systems)
- 8 to 10 double-ended 3/4-inch nipple connectors
- Duct tape for closing hoops (optional)
- Multicolored electrical tape for weighting and decorating hoops
Tools:
- Something sharp that can cut cleanly through the tubing
- Hot water or a hair dryer to soften the tubing (or really strong hands)
To make a hoop:
Measure out and cut enough tubing to make a hoop that, when stood on edge, reaches somewhere between the hooper's bellybutton and chest. (For me, that's between 11 and 12 feet of tubing. Yes, these hoops are larger than toy-store hoops; that's what makes them so fun and easy to use.)
Insert connector and shove hoop edges tightly together. Wrap seam securely in duct or electrical tape. Decorate with electrical tape, being careful not to add so much tape that the hoop gets too heavy for your skills and energy level. (We have hoops with no decoration at all.)
To hula hoop:
Position the hoop at about waist level and give it a good spin. Move your hips slightly to keep the hoop in motion. It doesn't take a big motion, and you can choose to go front to back or side to side or sort of all around. Click here to view many demonstrations.
With MANY thanks to Dana the Coffee Goddess for instructions, tips, and hours of fun!
Labels:
recipes
LMGTFY
Okay, this is pretty fun. You know how sometimes people on the Internet ask for information, and then you go to Google and find the answer for them? Well, this site lets you create a little Google tutorial to show them how it's done. To be used only in the friendliest of fashions, of course! :-)
Sample search: ozzy osbourne lita ford duet
Sample search: ozzy osbourne lita ford duet
Labels:
now my life is complete
Friday, July 17, 2009
Questioning what you believe
So, I posted in my Friday Fill-in that I'm reading "The Power of Mindful Learning." I've actually just started it, but I already want to blog about it. Here is some food for thought from just the Introduction. It's a list of "pervasive myths" that the author, Ellen J. Langer, believes need to be questioned:
1. The basics must be learned so well that they become second nature.
2. Paying attention means staying focused on one thing at a time.
3. Delaying gratification is important.
4. Rote memorization is necessary in education.
5. Forgetting is a problem.
6. Intelligence is knowing "what's out there."
7. There are right and wrong answers.
I've blogged before about how moving into unschooling caused me to question just about everything I believed, with Why? being the most powerful question. When I ask Why? about each of those myths, I get some pretty underwhelming answers. How about you?
1. The basics must be learned so well that they become second nature.
2. Paying attention means staying focused on one thing at a time.
3. Delaying gratification is important.
4. Rote memorization is necessary in education.
5. Forgetting is a problem.
6. Intelligence is knowing "what's out there."
7. There are right and wrong answers.
I've blogged before about how moving into unschooling caused me to question just about everything I believed, with Why? being the most powerful question. When I ask Why? about each of those myths, I get some pretty underwhelming answers. How about you?
Labels:
mindfulness,
unschooling
Friday fill-in

1. Cheese and crackers make a quick and easy dinner.
2. The Power of Mindful Learning is the book I'm reading right now.
3. July brings back memories of sweet peas.
4. That I would wait until the last minute was obvious.
5. They say if you tell your dreams your listeners will likely be bored.
6. It's my habit (and not always a healthy one) to think it over.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to going shopping for a kiddie pool and some navy blue accessories for our very green bathroom, tomorrow my plans include welcoming Jerry, Cori, and Molly from New Orleans, and Sunday, I want to play with Mollypop!
Labels:
fridays
It's a wide sky life
Most unschooling conferences have something called "funshops." These are hour-long sessions dedicated to something that the funshop host is passionate about or just enjoys. The past two years at LIFE is Good, I've hosted drum circle funshops, despite my lack of experience, because I just love drumming. Other past funshops have included things ranging from varieties of crafts, to skateboarding, to World of Warcraft, to American Girl dolls, to dance, to I don't know what all.
So, earlier this week we got together up on Vancouver Island with a bunch of other unschooling families, and Craig noted how an unschooler's life is one big funshop. It is so true, and it represents one of my very favorite things about hanging out with these people. Every time we get together with unschoolers, I get to try something I've never tried before. Sometimes it's something really cool, like archery (thanks, Kyrie!), and sometimes it's something little, like coffee made from fresh-roasted beans (thanks, Shannon!).
Enhancing the funshop lifestyle is countless little moments of connection and sharing and joy. Here is something I wrote for Ren's recent Facebook meme:
List some things you did this week:
--I learned to shoot a bow and arrow and actually hit the target. I played Mario Kart. I hunted orks along the Galloping Goose trail with a bunch of unschoolers. I sat on the bluff talking to Effie, got sawed in two by Fergus, read books with Meah, played guitar with MJ, watched Chloe and Qacei jump on the trampoline, listened to Conor making the younger gamers laugh, and climbed a mountain with Benja. I saw dolphins and seals from a ferry (which is different from seeing faeries from a dolphin, but still pretty magical). I made love with my husband. I read a book. I ate Thai food. I got a hug from a friend in a vulnerable moment. I held a newborn. I got my feet *very* dirty. I procrastinated. I slept.
And what's cool, what makes this life is so amazing, is that I could write a similar list just about every week, even (especially!) when it's just the four of us tucked up at home.
And what's REALLY cool is that I am waxing rhapsodic after a week that has definitely had its ups and downs. An unschooling life is not a perfect life. We are not immune to stress, screwups, frustrations, meltdowns, mishaps, misunderstandings, arguments, or just plain fights. We experience tragedies and we have troubles.
But what we have to fall back on in our tough times is this funshop life. It's good.
Credit for the title of this blog post goes to Amy Steinberg. Happy birthday, Amy!
So, earlier this week we got together up on Vancouver Island with a bunch of other unschooling families, and Craig noted how an unschooler's life is one big funshop. It is so true, and it represents one of my very favorite things about hanging out with these people. Every time we get together with unschoolers, I get to try something I've never tried before. Sometimes it's something really cool, like archery (thanks, Kyrie!), and sometimes it's something little, like coffee made from fresh-roasted beans (thanks, Shannon!).
Enhancing the funshop lifestyle is countless little moments of connection and sharing and joy. Here is something I wrote for Ren's recent Facebook meme:
List some things you did this week:
--I learned to shoot a bow and arrow and actually hit the target. I played Mario Kart. I hunted orks along the Galloping Goose trail with a bunch of unschoolers. I sat on the bluff talking to Effie, got sawed in two by Fergus, read books with Meah, played guitar with MJ, watched Chloe and Qacei jump on the trampoline, listened to Conor making the younger gamers laugh, and climbed a mountain with Benja. I saw dolphins and seals from a ferry (which is different from seeing faeries from a dolphin, but still pretty magical). I made love with my husband. I read a book. I ate Thai food. I got a hug from a friend in a vulnerable moment. I held a newborn. I got my feet *very* dirty. I procrastinated. I slept.
And what's cool, what makes this life is so amazing, is that I could write a similar list just about every week, even (especially!) when it's just the four of us tucked up at home.
And what's REALLY cool is that I am waxing rhapsodic after a week that has definitely had its ups and downs. An unschooling life is not a perfect life. We are not immune to stress, screwups, frustrations, meltdowns, mishaps, misunderstandings, arguments, or just plain fights. We experience tragedies and we have troubles.
But what we have to fall back on in our tough times is this funshop life. It's good.
Credit for the title of this blog post goes to Amy Steinberg. Happy birthday, Amy!
Labels:
unschooling
Hope in meditation
Practice, practice, practice!
http://happydays.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/07/16/sitting-quietly-doing-something/
http://happydays.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/07/16/sitting-quietly-doing-something/
Labels:
meditation
Friday, July 10, 2009
x/69
I'm sick. I'm tired. I'm depressed. I'm supposed to be packed/ing to leave in the a.m. to go up to party with friends in Canada, but I don't have the energy. I'm worried I might have to disappoint said friends and my daughters by bowing out of the fun.
But all of that is too icky to think about, so I'm answering the questions I feel like answering from this meme that Frank did.
1. PICK ONE OF YOUR SCARS OUT. NOW HOW DID YOU GET IT?
I'm feeling rebellious, so I'm doing three scars:
- Forehead just left of my right eyebrow: chicken pox.
- Inner thigh just above my left knee: a normally very (very!) sweet neighbor dog bit me after being crushed by a car.
- Center knuckle of the index finger on my right hand: I failed to let go of a line I really should have let go of while sailing in the Virgins.
5. WHAT WAS YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE?
Two come to mind:
- MJ (who in the dream was also my little sister, Lynn) was in our basement, in terrible danger, and I couldn't get to her.
- My former stepfather (known around here as "The Asshole") and I were on opposite sides of a very tall chain-link fence. There was a rope tossed over the top of the fence, and he and I each had hold of it. In the dream it was very clear that it was My Rope, but he kept wheedling with me, trying to get me to share "just some of it" with him, and I didn't want to, but he wouldn't stop asking. Very stressful, and very symbolic.
13. DO YOU REMEMBER BIRTHDAYS?
If asked, I can recall the birthdates of most of the people (parents, siblings, spouses, children, nieces and nephews) in my immediate family and Frank's. But I am very hit and miss about acknowledging said birthdates in a timely fashion.
Ahem. Happy belated birthday, Daddy!
14. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
Early afternoon.
15. DO YOU HAVE A BIRTHMARK? WHERE?
I used to have one on my right thigh, but there's barely a trace of it now.
17. WHAT IS THE WEIRDEST THING YOU HAVE EVER DONE?
Define weird. Much of my life is considered weird by someone or other.
18. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU STARTED FILLING THIS IN?
Feeling miserable and sorry for myself.
27. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ON SOMEONE (OPPOSITE SEX)?
Face and hair.
31. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
Small spaces bother me if someone or something is blocking the exit therefrom. Frank and the girls hear me say "Let me out" with some regularity.
32. COULD YOU EVER SEE YOURSELF MOVING FROM WHERE YOU ARE?
Yep. I have a love/hate relationship with our house. It's a great house and we've raised our babies here, but it represents so much responsibility and work. Everywhere I look I see chores.
33. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DISNEY MOVIE OF ALL TIME?
Beauty and the Beast. Nice to see the guy be the one to get rescued for a change.
34. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SONG OF ALL TIME?
"You Shook Me All Night Long" by AC/DC has long been a favorite. But there are others.
39. WHO WAS YOUR FIRST CRUSH WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE?
Not positive he was first, but Jeff Wenzel gave me my first kiss. We were seven.
42. WHO OUT OF YOUR CURRENT FRIENDS (SAME SEX) HAVE YOU KNOWN THE LONGEST?
A couple of kids from elementary school are my friends on Facebook (Janie Hansen being the one I've known longest), but from my friends-in-real-life it's a tie between Erin and Denise, I think, with Steph a close third.
43. NOW THE OPPOSITE SEX?
The Facebook/elementary school entry for this one is probably Brian Roberts. In real life, it's Chris, then Frank.
49. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES?
Asked and answered here.
53. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX)?
Aaron, my boyfriend in middle school, gave me a heart necklace. I might still have that somewhere.
56. WHAT KIND OF BOOKS DO YOU LIKE TO READ?
Romances. I used to be embarrassed to admit that but not anymore. Character development is key in those, and that is always my favorite thing to read about or see in a movie.
Plus, the writing in books that are more socially accepted is so bad sometimes. Or horribly depressing. Oprah's Book Club? Gah! Shooting myself in the head would be more cheerful than some of those.
Don't get me started.
57. DO YOU LIKE POETRY?
Some of it. I tend to like stuff that rhymes (Yes! It's a poem!), but I appreciate a lovely turn of phrase wherever I find it.
Here's a favorite. I also love this one.
Chloe and I were just discussing this one today. Is the reference to "nunnery" a jab? Is the protagonist full of shit? Interesting questions like that.
58. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR COFFEE?
Three ways:
- At home: fresh ground, about 1/3 milk, two or three spoonfuls of sugar
- At Starbucks: caramel machiatto
- At other coffee joints: caramel latte
59. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PHRASE TO USE?
"Anyway..."
60. DRAGONS OR DINOSAURS?
Dragons in books, dinosaurs in movies.
67. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
Most often: left-lane hogs.
Most intensely: things not being done my way. I suppose the left lane thing is a member of this group.
69. ANY LAST THOUGHTS?
Too many to list.
But all of that is too icky to think about, so I'm answering the questions I feel like answering from this meme that Frank did.
1. PICK ONE OF YOUR SCARS OUT. NOW HOW DID YOU GET IT?
I'm feeling rebellious, so I'm doing three scars:
- Forehead just left of my right eyebrow: chicken pox.
- Inner thigh just above my left knee: a normally very (very!) sweet neighbor dog bit me after being crushed by a car.
- Center knuckle of the index finger on my right hand: I failed to let go of a line I really should have let go of while sailing in the Virgins.
5. WHAT WAS YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE?
Two come to mind:
- MJ (who in the dream was also my little sister, Lynn) was in our basement, in terrible danger, and I couldn't get to her.
- My former stepfather (known around here as "The Asshole") and I were on opposite sides of a very tall chain-link fence. There was a rope tossed over the top of the fence, and he and I each had hold of it. In the dream it was very clear that it was My Rope, but he kept wheedling with me, trying to get me to share "just some of it" with him, and I didn't want to, but he wouldn't stop asking. Very stressful, and very symbolic.
13. DO YOU REMEMBER BIRTHDAYS?
If asked, I can recall the birthdates of most of the people (parents, siblings, spouses, children, nieces and nephews) in my immediate family and Frank's. But I am very hit and miss about acknowledging said birthdates in a timely fashion.
Ahem. Happy belated birthday, Daddy!
14. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
Early afternoon.
15. DO YOU HAVE A BIRTHMARK? WHERE?
I used to have one on my right thigh, but there's barely a trace of it now.
17. WHAT IS THE WEIRDEST THING YOU HAVE EVER DONE?
Define weird. Much of my life is considered weird by someone or other.
18. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU STARTED FILLING THIS IN?
Feeling miserable and sorry for myself.
27. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ON SOMEONE (OPPOSITE SEX)?
Face and hair.
31. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
Small spaces bother me if someone or something is blocking the exit therefrom. Frank and the girls hear me say "Let me out" with some regularity.
32. COULD YOU EVER SEE YOURSELF MOVING FROM WHERE YOU ARE?
Yep. I have a love/hate relationship with our house. It's a great house and we've raised our babies here, but it represents so much responsibility and work. Everywhere I look I see chores.
33. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DISNEY MOVIE OF ALL TIME?
Beauty and the Beast. Nice to see the guy be the one to get rescued for a change.
34. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SONG OF ALL TIME?
"You Shook Me All Night Long" by AC/DC has long been a favorite. But there are others.
39. WHO WAS YOUR FIRST CRUSH WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE?
Not positive he was first, but Jeff Wenzel gave me my first kiss. We were seven.
42. WHO OUT OF YOUR CURRENT FRIENDS (SAME SEX) HAVE YOU KNOWN THE LONGEST?
A couple of kids from elementary school are my friends on Facebook (Janie Hansen being the one I've known longest), but from my friends-in-real-life it's a tie between Erin and Denise, I think, with Steph a close third.
43. NOW THE OPPOSITE SEX?
The Facebook/elementary school entry for this one is probably Brian Roberts. In real life, it's Chris, then Frank.
49. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES?
Asked and answered here.
53. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX)?
Aaron, my boyfriend in middle school, gave me a heart necklace. I might still have that somewhere.
56. WHAT KIND OF BOOKS DO YOU LIKE TO READ?
Romances. I used to be embarrassed to admit that but not anymore. Character development is key in those, and that is always my favorite thing to read about or see in a movie.
Plus, the writing in books that are more socially accepted is so bad sometimes. Or horribly depressing. Oprah's Book Club? Gah! Shooting myself in the head would be more cheerful than some of those.
Don't get me started.
57. DO YOU LIKE POETRY?
Some of it. I tend to like stuff that rhymes (Yes! It's a poem!), but I appreciate a lovely turn of phrase wherever I find it.
Here's a favorite. I also love this one.
Chloe and I were just discussing this one today. Is the reference to "nunnery" a jab? Is the protagonist full of shit? Interesting questions like that.
58. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR COFFEE?
Three ways:
- At home: fresh ground, about 1/3 milk, two or three spoonfuls of sugar
- At Starbucks: caramel machiatto
- At other coffee joints: caramel latte
59. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PHRASE TO USE?
"Anyway..."
60. DRAGONS OR DINOSAURS?
Dragons in books, dinosaurs in movies.
67. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
Most often: left-lane hogs.
Most intensely: things not being done my way. I suppose the left lane thing is a member of this group.
69. ANY LAST THOUGHTS?
Too many to list.
Labels:
memes
Friday, July 3, 2009
Friday fill-in

1. When I heard Helen's baby had been born, I got very happy. It's a girl!
2. "Wait and see" is often the best medicine.
3. It's late, but I'm blogging anyway.
4. I love Chloe always (and other people, too, but she's the one standing here helping me do my fill-in).
5. My eyes have seen strange sights via Facebook, such as Jeff and Jon in hula skirts (thanks for that, Heather).
6. I love Chloe strongly (see above).
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to (or at least considering) going to a drum jam in Seattle, tomorrow my plans include eating, being a pirate, watching my daughters blow things up, and consuming enough margarita to avoid being scared all day, and Sunday, I want to recover!
Labels:
fridays
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